Page 70 of Forbidden Dreams
I was an idiot for getting involved. But I didn't want to walk away. I kept putting off the inevitable, falling more for her each day. It wasn't going to get easier. It was only going to get harder.
When I felt more normal, I ducked into the hallway bathroom and splashed cold water on my face, then washed my hands. Hopefully, no one would know what I was up to. The crazy part was that her brothers probably wouldn't suspect me of sleeping with their sister. They trusted me, and I was betraying that trust.
I slowly made my way downstairs, not looking forward to pretending that Aspen still irritated me. I saw the woman that her parents and brothers couldn't. The one that was so capable and confident. Who knew exactly what she wanted, to be happy and fulfilled.
She was guided by feelings, not expectations. And I loved that about her. The thought that I loved her hit me as I made it to the bottom step, making me pause.
I loved Aspen Sterling. The one woman I couldn't have. But I let that feeling wash over me. I sensed that I'd always love her, no matter what happened between us.
The family was sprawled throughout the house now, in the living room, the kitchen, and a few on the porch. I moved into the living room, hoping to escape notice for a while.
Hudson's hand landed on my shoulder. "Where you've been?"
I shrugged him off. "I wasn't feeling good."
He raised a brow. "You want to head out?"
"I'm hoping it passes." It was the perfect excuse for me being upstairs and out of sight for a while. I just hoped that Aspen hadn't used the same excuse.
He pouted. "Thanksgiving wouldn't be the same without you."
"How long have I been coming over for the holidays?" I mused.
"Forever," he said with a grin.
A chill passed through me at the idea that I wouldn't be welcome if he knew what I'd done with his sister upstairs. "Your family's been good to me."
"Eh. We like you for some reason," he teased.
Was it time to share more of my life with them? "Emery's home. I'm going to head out a little early to spend time with her and my mom."
He frowned. "You okay being over there?"
"As long as my dad doesn't show up." It felt good admitting that to him.
"If he knew what was good for him, he'd stay away," Hudson said, his jaw tight.
When I’d told him about my family, I didn't expect him to feel so strongly about it. "He only cares about what he can get from someone. And he uses my mom's love for him to take things from her. I wish that she'd realized a long time ago that it wasn't love.
"You deserve better. Emery too. You should invite her over here."
"Are you sure?" I'd never mixed Emery and the Sterlings. They were something I always kept for myself. But I wasn't a kid anymore. The only way I'd lose them was if they found out about Aspen.
"Mom won't mind. She'd love to get to know her."
"Okay." I pulled out my phone as Hudson moved toward where Ayla was playing a card game with Maverick.
Angela was sitting on a nearby recliner, touching her stomach and smiling at her family.
At that moment, I wanted to see Aspen's stomach swollen with my child. The vision was so real; it was hard to breathe. I hadn't thought I wanted a family. In fact, I'd decided I shouldn't bring a child into this world. But maybe I could with Aspen, and that had to mean something.
My fingers fumbled, bringing up Emery's contact information.
Cooper: You want to come over for dinner at the Sterlings?
Emery: You've never invited me there before.
Cooper: Hudson said I should.
