Page 22 of Searching for her Heart
“Nine years?! Have you been by yourself this whole time?” I feel him nod his head.
“Can I ask why?” When he doesn’t answer, I add, “You don’t have to tell me, if you don’t want to.”
“I’ve never told anyone about it before.”
“Well, if you ever want to, I’m here, and I will listen without judgment, if you want.” He makes a small grunt as we continue on our trek. Occasionally, Ryker will move forward and peek up at me, asking if I’m doing okay. The way he constantly checkson me warms my heart.
“Ryker?” I ask as I think about how little I know about him.
“Yea, Red?” he asks with a smile.
“You don’t seem eager to get back to your job or life, how come?” I see his smile drop as he turns to watch where he’s walking.
I don’t think he’s going to answer when he finally speaks, “I don’t have much of a home, really. There’s nothing waiting for me back there.”
“No friends or family?”
He shakes his head. “No, my parents don’t talk to me. We… had a falling out when I was younger and they basically disowned me. I consider myself parentless now. And as you already know, I have no siblings.”
“And friends? You’re so kind and charming, you must have lots of friends.” I tell him honestly.
“It’s hard to make friends when you’re a…” his eyes move to mine nervously, “A loneling.” He should know that doesn’t bother me by now.
“Well, don’t worry Ry,” I say, reaching my hand out over Brax’s shoulder for Ryker to take. “You’ve got me now, and you can’t get rid of me so easily.”
“I hope not,” he whispers before squeezing my hand and releasing it.
I can tell I’ve brought the mood down by asking about their personal lives. Maybe it’s only fair I share a bit of my own?
“I lied to you guys.”
“What?” They both halt in the tracks, turning their heads to me in surprise.
“I said I didn’t have any siblings. Well, technically I don’t anymore, but I had a brother once… he was my twin.” I whisper the last words at the memory of Charlie.
Slowly, we start walking again and I think they are waiting forme to tell them more.
“We were pretty close growing up. Sure, he had his friends, and I had Ria, but we still enjoyed doing things together. He was sort of like my other half, you know?” I find my fingers playing with the fur on the top of Brax’s chest, somehow that’s easier than risking eye contact as I tell them the story.
“When we were sixteen, he wanted to go to a concert in the city, but mom and dad said no. He told me to sneak out with him, but I didn’t like the band so I said no, so he went with a couple friends. I guess he made some bad decisions that night and ended up in the wrong place at the wrong time. Some guys tried to rob him and his friends, but his friends took off and left him there. Charlie ended up getting stabbed. The knife punctured two organs, and the paramedics couldn’t get there fast enough. He died that day, in some dirty alley, all alone.”
I don’t realize we’ve stopped walking or that I’m crying until strong arms wrap around me as I’m pulled into someone’s strong chest.Braxton. “Oh, Baby, I’m so sorry you lost him like that. That must have been terrible for you, to lose someone so close.” He presses his lips to my head before Ryker’s fingers stroke through my hair, making me turn my gaze to him. “You miss him?” he says it like a question, but we both know the answer as I nod, wiping my teary face with my hands.
“The weird thing is, now I wonder if he was even my twin. If my soul was supposed to be here. The Penny that is now in the human world has a twin she’ll never meet. It’s just so… confusing.”
We’re all silent for a moment before Braxton finally breaks the silence. “I killed my mother.”
I look up at him with wide eyes. “Uhh… Care to elaborate?” I don’t for one second believe that he murdered his mother, I’m sure it’s just something he’s blaming himself for.
“She died giving birth to me. My fathers’ always blamed me.Said if my head wasn’t so big, she’d still be alive.”
“Brax, you know that’s horseshit, right? A baby can’t be blamed for being born. It’s not your fault that she died.”
He looks at me and I can see him grinding his teeth. He doesn’t believe me, he blames himself.
“Brax, I’m serious. It’s not your fault. Tell me what happened with your fathers?”
“They barely tolerated me. Barely paid attention. The second I was old enough, I got a job in town so I could start saving money and as soon as I was sixteen and knew I could get hired full time, I left home. I moved around for a while, not really sure what I wanted to do. Nine years ago, I was working in this really tiny village as a blacksmith. One day, a woman came in looking for something to be made for one of her husbands. I asked her about him to get a good idea of what I can make that would be unique and personal for him, but her men arrived and accused me of trying to seduce her. We didn’t even get closer than five feet from one another. But they didn’t care, within the hour, they had everybody in the village on their side. So I just packed up and left. I decided I’d rather live in solitude than deal with people like that.”
