Page 176 of What We Brave
What do I say when I walk in? "Hey, sorry I ran out of here like the house was haunted, I was just having a minor emotional crisis about whether I deserve happiness, anyway what's for lunch?"
Actually that might work. Reid would laugh. Blake would do that jaw thing where he's trying not to smile.
Okay. That's the plan. Walk in. Be honest. Don't run.
You can do this.
Probably.
I pull into the driveway. Reid's truck. Blake's truck. Both still here.
Of course they're still here. They said they would be.
I turn off the engine. Grab my keys. Take one more breath.
Show up, Mitchell. Just show up.
I go inside.
33
BLAKE
The door clicks shut behind her and I watch through the window as she backs out of the driveway. Too fast. She's driving too fast.
She's running.
I stand there like a fucking idiot, watching the space where her car was. The driveway looks wrong without it. Empty in a way that freaks me the fuck out.
Reid's somewhere behind me. I can feel him hovering. Waiting for me to say something. Do something. Be normal.
I'm not normal. I'm standing at a window watching an empty driveway and my brain is already?—
Too rough. Yesterday. The dresser — the sound it made when the pull snapped off. The way she gasped when I pushed in. Was that pain? Was that her trying to tell me to stop and I was too far gone to?—
No. She said she was fine. More than fine. She said don't stop.
People say shit they don't mean when they're?—
"She said she was meeting Jamila," Reid offers from behind me. I don't know if he's trying to reassure me, or himself.
"Yeah."
Quiet.
"Could be true," he says. "Jamila's her person. Makes sense she'd want to talk to?—"
"She didn't have plans, Reid." I turn from the window. "She woke up and left. That's not meeting a friend. That's leaving."
"You don't know that."
"I know what running looks like."
He flinches. Barely. But I catch it because I catch everything and right now I wish I didn't.
Nice, asshole. Remind him about all the other people who've run. That's helpful.
I drag a hand down my face. "Sorry. That wasn't?—"
