Page 25 of Lillith
“Let’s get dried off and I’ll tell you everything,” he promised. She wasn’t sure that she was going to like what he was about to tell her, but she needed to know what she was up against—not only with the men chasing him, but also with Tank. She wanted a relationship with him, and that meant that she was going to have to hear about his past—even the parts that she didn’t like.
TANK
Tank knew the exact second everything changed. It was the second he stopped holding back and let himself have her. It hit him like a punch to the chest the moment their foreheads rested together under the spray of the water, both of them breathing hard, both of them a little unsteady. He’d crossed a line—one he couldn’t uncross. It had been one he was fighting since the second he met her.
“Fuck,” he muttered under his breath as he dried her off.
Lillith let out a soft laugh, her hands still resting against his chest. “Yeah, that about sums it up.” He should step back from her, putting some space between them. He knew that he should rebuild the walls he’d been hiding behind for weeks, but he didn’t. He promised to tell her everything, and that included what happened to Cami. She was the reason that he was holding back with Lillith. Letting her close meant that she’d be put into the line of fire—just like Cami. What if he couldn’t protect Lillith? What if she ended up dead? He couldn’t lose her—not now.
His hands tightened on her like he was afraid she’d disappear if he let go. “You don’t make this easy,” he said.
Her lips curved slightly. “Pretty sure you’re the one making it hard.” That earned her a look—one that should’ve warned her, but it didn’t
“You should’ve stayed in bed,” he said, though there wasn’t much heat behind it now.
“And miss this?” she asked softly, looking his naked body up and down. Tank’s jaw tightened. Because this was exactly what he’d been trying to avoid. Not the sex or the attraction that he felt for her, but what would come after—the attachment and the complications. They would make him weak and make him drop his guard. He couldn’t allow that to happen.
“You don’t know what this is,” he said.
Her expression didn’t waver. “Then tell me.”
“I can’t,” he breathed.
“You won’t,” she corrected again. God, she was frustrating. She didn’t let anything go. Hell, she didn’t even let him go, and for some reason, that made something inside him shift in a way he didn’t like.
“You keep pushing,” he said quietly.
“And you keep running,” she shot back just as softly. Tank exhaled slowly, his grip loosening just enough to give her space—though he didn’t fully let go.
“You should get dressed,” he said finally. “You’re gonna freeze.”
She glanced down at herself, then back up at him, one brow arching. “You’re stalling,” she said. “Do you actually want me to put clothes on?” she asked.
His mouth twitched despite himself. “Yeah, before I do something else that I shouldn’t.” Her gaze held his as though she was challenging him to do just that.
“Maybe I’d be okay with that, Tank,” she whispered, letting her towel hit the floor. He looked her over and shook his head, trying to rid himself of every thought that was currently cloudinghis mind. That was the problem with him being with Lillith—she didn’t let him think straight.
Tank stepped back then, finally breaking the contact, and breaking the moment before it pulled him in deeper than he could afford again. “You don’t mean that,” he said roughly.
“Don’t I?” she asked.
“No,” he said, more firmly now. “You don’t.” Because if she really understood what being tied to him meant, then she wouldn’t be standing here. Lillith wouldn’t be looking at him like that, and there was no fucking way that she’d trust him.
Lillith studied him for a long second, and then slowly nodded. “Okay,” she said. Somehow her compliance felt worse than if she had actually argued with him.
“You can use the bathroom to get dressed,” he said, not looking at her.
He heard her move behind him. He could feel her every step towards him. “You promised me that you wouldn’t shut down like this, Tank. You promised to tell me everything. Do you always shut down like this?”
“Like what?” he asked, already knowing what she was talking about.
“Like you just did,” she said. “One minute you’re all in, the next you’re gone.” He didn’t answer right away because she wasn’t wrong, and he didn’t have a good answer.
“That’s how I stay alive,” he said finally. That was more than he should’ve given. Lillith didn’t respond right away, but when he finally glanced back, she was watching him.
“That sounds lonely,” she said softly. Tank’s chest tightened.
He shrugged it off. “It works.”
