Page 159 of Shelter
Every drop of blood in my veins seemed to rush to the surface of my skin. “What does that mean?”
I knew what it meant. I just couldn’t let myself believe it.
Cole gazed at me, a smile playing at one corner of his mouth. “I told her I’ll help her if she needs me, but from now on, her progress is up to her.”
“You didn’t,” I murmured, clutching the doorsill for support.
He took a step toward me, narrowing the distance between us to a mere foot. I had to tilt my head back to keep my eyes on his face.
His smile inched wider. “I did.”
A thrill of fear surged up my chest. “Why did you do that?” If I was the reason for his sudden change of heart, he might resent me in the long run. Especially if Ava only grew worse.
Cole studied me, the ease and determination still there in his eyes. In his smile. “It was time. Don’t you think?”
I opened my mouth to protest. I couldn’t weigh in on this. There was no right answer.
Before I could respond, Cole shook his head. “No matter what anyone else says, Ava and I agree it’s time.”
But when had they agreed? Before or after I’d left Mama’s? To me, the when mattered just as much as the why.
I opened my mouth to ask the question, but Cole lifted his hand and brought it to my cheek. “Let’s stop talking about Ava,” he said. “I want to talk about us.”
At the touch of his hand, I shut my eyes. His warm palm felt too good. Too real. It tempted me to trust.
In a feather-light touch, Cole ran the pad of his thumb over my left eyelid. “You’ve been crying,” he said softly.
I turned my chin away and opened my eyes, staring down at the safety of his shirt. “I was upset, but I’m okay now,” I lied.
Cole’s low chuckle poured over me like melted butter, and he resettled his hand on my cheek. “You suck at lying.”
Lifting my eyes to his, I tried my best to shoot him a glare, but I just liked seeing him too much.
Grinning at my wasted efforts, he shook his head. “Don’t worry. I’m not okay either,” he said, his smile turning rueful. “In fact, I’m a fucking wreck. Why are you doing this to me?”
His expression held, but I didn’t miss the flicker of genuine pain that moved behind it as he searched my eyes. I should have looked away, but by now I couldn’t. Cole stepped closer until there was just the tangle of our heat signatures between us. He raised his other hand until both were cupping my face.
“Elise. My Elise.Why are you doing this to me?” The words came out a whisper, and I felt his breath tickle over my lips.
Why?Why was I doing this?
I blinked in slow motion. His eyes now inches from mine had always seemed too unattainable. Sky-blue. Arctic-blue. Starlight-blue. A kind of blue I could never reach. He’d always been so far out of my reach. Even when we were kids.
“You’ll always belong to a higher purpose,” I said, thinking of the life he’d lived for his family. “Something more important, more worthy.”
A crease formed between his brows. “Than what?”
Saying it would make him see the truth, but he would come to the same conclusion in time. “Than me.”
Cole’s brows reached high on his forehead. His lips parted. “Than you?” he echoed, sounding astonished. “There’s nothing more important than you. I don’t for a minute deserve you, but I’m too damn selfish to walk away.”
The very idea of Cole being selfish had my head shaking in protest. “That’s crazy—”
His hands left my cheeks and fell to my shoulders. “Elise, I’ll tell you what’s crazy. You. You thinking I wouldn’t choose you. Over anything.” His eyes sparked with feeling. Then he shook his head. “I made the mistake once of turning my back on you. On the way I felt for you. And the results were disastrous.”
His grip on my shoulders tightened as a frown marked his forehead. “I spent eight years being miserable and adding to Ava’s misery. Elise.My Elise…”He stressed the words like a pledge. The ardor in his every feature, his eyes, the tension in his jaw, the curve of his mouth, made his beauty almost unbearable. “…I’m never making that mistake again.”
Hope, the cruel friend who had tormented me with her company since I was sixteen years old, sunk her claws into my heart. And it hurt like hell. If Cole was wrong about this… if I was wrong about this, I’d never recover.
