Page 8 of Made
His hand lingers, holding on to mine for much longer than a handshake normally requires. Far more than is polite. The prolonged touch of his skin against mine sends signals shooting all the way down my body. My stupid body still thinks we have a connection.
We absolutely do not, I remind myself. My only connection to Maddox James is a humiliating memory. And the fact that yeah, apparently he’s my boss’s brother. Fan-fucking-tastic.
“It’s good to see you again too,” I force out, wishing I were anywhere but here. Still, neither of us lets go. Me because I’m being polite, and him…? Well, I have no idea.
“You want to join us for lunch, Ellie?” Mason’s voice cuts through the thick silence.
“No.” I blurt out, probably a little too quickly. “I have a salad, and it’ll go bad. I hate wasting food.”
That is not a lie—I do hate wasting food—but I do not have a salad. I didn’t have time to make anything after my drama this morning, so I just shoved a whole box of sugary granola bars in my bag.
“Me too,” Maddox says, still holding onto my hand. Him too what, I think, lost in those deep, dark eyes. “Waste. I hate wasting food.”
“Yeah, you two have a lot in common,” Mason adds. “Mad never met a leftover he couldn’t turn into a better version of itself. He’s the same with the people he cares about.”
He grins at his brother, and I can see there’s something beneath the surface there, some reference I don’t get. I can’timagine Mason James ever being a leftover. But what do I know? Maybe he was, and maybe Maddox helped him recover.
Maddox seems to finally notice that he’s still holding my hand, and he releases it. I’m relieved, but also sad. I liked the way that felt, my fingers safe in his. And that makes me even more determined to avoid ever being in this position ever again. I learned early on in life that you must protect yourself, and Maddox spells danger in all kinds of ways.
I take a step back, keep my face neutral. His eyes flicker over my hair, and the way it’s now making a full-on prison break from the clips I used to pin it down.
“I’ll see you around, Ellie,” he says as they prepare to leave.
Not if I see you first, pal.Thankfully, those words stay tucked away on the inside, where I have all my best conversations. It wouldn’t be cool to say that out loud to my boss’s brother, especially with the boss right in front of him. The last thing I need is for Mason to find out the truth, especially after our conversation earlier. I simply smile politely.
Seems I spoke way too soon about my work life being perfect.
Chapter 3
Maddox
“So, you want to tell me what that was all about?” Mason at least waits until we’re in the elevator before he starts questioning me about what just happened in his office. I was shocked as hell to discover his new VP is the girl I spent that amazing night with. The one I still think about now whenever the moon is full and low in the sky. The one I remember every time I make that Moroccan lamb Mason loves so much.
“You mean Ellie?”
“No, I mean you saying hello to Deborah. Of course I mean Ellie.”
“I told you,” I say, shrugging. Trying to appear nonchalant. “We met while I was traveling.”
Mason gives me a sideways look that tells me he’s not buying it. “You met a lot of people when you were traveling, Mad. But the way you were looking at her, the way you held on to her hand, I felt like I should leave the fucking room, bro. Do you have a thing for my marketing VP? Because she’s damn good at her job and I don’t want to lose her.”
“No,” I scoff. “I do not have a ‘thing’ for her. Anyhow, I don’t work for you,bro. Even if I did have a thing for her, it would be none of your fucking business.”
I sound annoyed. Iamannoyed, or at least unsettled. I rarely lose my cool like this, and Mason glares at me as the elevator takes us down to the lobby. He stays silent for a moment, then face palms. “Aw shit…Don’t tell me she was one of the women you slept with while you werewhoringyourway around Africa and Europe?”
“Hey,” I warn, feeling the irritation prickling beneath my skin like a heat rash.
“Hey yourself. Those were your exact words, Mad. I didn’t make them up, that’s how you described it.”
I grunt. He’s right, I know he is. That’s part of the reason why I’m irritated, and it’s most of the reason why I’m celibate. I hated that version of me. He was an out-of-control douchebag. It was one of the many ways I tried to escape the darkness inside me.
If that version had met Ellie six months before I did, I would have for sure taken her to bed after dinner. I’d have taken what she offered, fucked her all night, and then again in the morning. And it would have meant nothing to me, no matter how terrific she was, because I was in no fit state to form any kind of relationship.
I shared some of that with her during our amazing conversation that night. I told her I was a work in progress, that I was finding my way towards healing. I didn’t tell her about the celibacy, though, because that’s a huge buzzkill, and truthfully kind of hard to explain. I enjoyed talking to her, flirting with her, the little zing of sensation every time we accidentally touched. It was somehow innocent, even more intimate because it didn’t end with the predictable fucking. It was special.
“Earth to Maddox,” Mason says, using a fake over-the-intercom voice. “Come in, Maddox.”
“No, she wasn’t,” I snap back. “I met Ellie after I became celibate, okay?”
