Page 53 of Ahelno
“It is a light pink, I suppose. She said it is mild.”
“First, if she said it’s mild, then it is, and she knows how totake care of it. Second, she’s lived in that skin her whole life. She should have known she would burn if she was outside all day. She should’ve brought a hat or worn sunscreen. This is her fault, not yours.”
“What is sunscreen?” I asked. “Is it a shade?”
“Welp, there are some cultures on Earth where women walk around with a shade called a parasol, but we don’t do that on our side of the planet because most people wear sunscreen when they go outside. It’s a special lotion that we can put on our skin to block the UV rays.”
“What is it made of?” I had to know.
“There are different kinds. Some have chemicals in them, but I don’t remember what they are. But a common mineral blocker is a lotion that has zinc oxide in it.”
“That seems a common enough compound to find. How does it function?” I asked.
“I’m no expert, but I guess they grind it up into some powder or something and then mix it with lotion. You spread that on your skin, and the zinc oxide blocks the UV rays (that’s the ultraviolet rays that cause the sunburn). It’s usually a white lotion. I don’t know what you would use for lotion here. We use a lot of cocoa butter or shea butter, but y’all don’t have those here. I use an emulsion of water and loabu bean oil from Coromonn as a pretty effective moisturizer on my skin. You could probably mix ground-up zinc oxide with that to make a sunscreen.”
“Yes, I will do that! What other things do you know about humans that I should know?”
“Hmmm, I guess you’ve figured out we’re pretty touchy-feely. You Ptexari don’t ever touch each other, and that’s going to be hard for Andie if you’re serious about being hermate.”
“Yes, I have offered to hug her, but she does not seem as interested as I would like.”
“It may take some time. She’s still wary of you, given how y’all started out. It’s best to start slow. In the beginning, men court women with gifts - it doesn’t have to be anything big or extravagant. We give flowers or sweets that they like, or something thoughtful that shows we know them. Andie loves music and dance, so if there was a performance somewhere, she would love tickets to something like that. I mean, your Dad’s piano was over the top. That would be, like, a major gift. It shows that he paid attention to what she said she missed about Earth.”
I growled at him, “My father is not courting Andie.”
“No, no! Of course not,” he said. “I’m just saying that would be the type of gift to give a mate for a very special occasion. Or a daughter, in your father’s case. Let’s see… we like to go on dates - that’s kind of what y’all did today. You just go out somewhere and spend time together to get to know each other better. Try to do something fun. Maybe take her to dinner at a new restaurant, that kind of thing. When you’re deeper in the relationship, you might give her jewelry or accessories that you know she’d like. Cute purses or shoes. Robnar makes her clothes, so maybe you could ask him if she’s been eyeing a particular dress or talking about clothing.
Does it ever get cold here? Because blankets and warm things also make good gifts for women. I swear, they’re always cold. Fuzzy slippers, pajamas, shit like that. That’s all I can think of right now.”
“Gifts and dates,” I mused. “I can do that.”
“I mean, that’s just for starting out. Human relationships can be super complicated. It will be even worse for you and Andie because of the whole interspecies thing. You’ll need to have really open, direct communication. You’ll end up apologizing a lot. Happy wife, happy life,” he chuckled.
“I do not understand.”
“It’s an adage for human men. It basically means shut up, and don’t tell your woman she’s wrong. If she’s happy, you’ll be happy. If you’re more worried about being right than making her happy, she’ll be miserable, and she’ll make you miserable.
“I see.” This did sound complicated.
“Look, don’t you have info about humans in your database?” Leo asked.
“No, very little. Andie is the first human we’ve encountered, so we’ve never needed any information on humans.”
“Well, there’s plenty on the larger intergalactic network. You have access, right? Do some searches and download some shit. But don’t believe it all. There’s some crazy misconceptions written about humans out there. If you have any questions about what you read, you can send me a message, and I’ll tell you if it’s true or not. A popular one is that we crave touch so much that we have to be carried around everywhere. I mean, yeah, we’re clingy compared to some species, but we don’t want to be carried around like pets. Weird, man.”
“But you do like to be touched?”
“Yes, especially by our partners. Touch is an important part of our relationships. If you get into it deeper with Andie - if she lets you, she’s going to want to hold your hand a lot. She’ll want to snuggle up next to you as you watch a vid. There’skissing, you need to learn about kissing - search for that. And then there’s care and grooming, like washing her in the bath or brushing her hair. Even painting her nails for her can be cute, if she’ll let you and if you want to try it. Girls like to feel cared for.”
This was good advice. I was feeling calmer and more determined. “Thank you, Leo,” I said, and I meant it. He was a good male. He was a good friend to Andie, giving me the advice to properly court her in the human way. “I have some ideas now. Thank you for explaining about the sunscreen to me and how to court my mate. I may reach out to you again for advice.”
“Anytime, man,” he said. “Besides, that was a lot more interesting than the meetings with the ambassadors and your family. Let me head out before they finish up. I don’t want to have to sit through another boring-ass meal.”
“Understood,” I said, rising as he left the room. I headed down to the medical wing to find Lanicar.
Andie
I had just finished soaking in the cool water. Already I felt better, although my skin was still hot to the touch. I looked in the mirror. It was definitely going to peel. I slipped on a silky robe. I planned to order food from the replicator and turn in.
