Page 25 of Roses from Pemberley
“No, simply tired.”
“You do not wish to go to the parsonage?”
“No,” he answered, feeling infinitely weary. “I believe I am no longer needed there.”
He left Lady Catherine and Mrs. Jenkinson, returned to his room, and, for the second time that day, fell into bed with his boots still on.
Some time later that afternoon, he was awakened by the sound of a throat being cleared somewhere within his room. He opened his eyes and turned his head slightly to see Richard sitting in an armchair a few feet away from his bed.
“Miss Elizabeth is awake,” he said.
“Yes, Mr. Collins told us so earlier. Did you see her?”
“Of course not. She was still too weak to go downstairs. But the point is she was significantly better.”
“I am glad to hear it.”
“Will you not go and see her?”
“I suppose I will. Perhaps tomorrow. Or the day after.”
“Tomorrow! But you have been with her night and day! Why should you stop coming now?”
Darcy shrugged. “Because…she turned down my offer of marriage.”
“So now you shall simply give up, after everything you have done for her?”
“No, of course not! But I am simply giving her a chance…to recuperate. Without any interference from me.”
Richard nodded slowly. “But do you not think that your presence will help in her recovery?”
Darcy sighed. “It may. But it may also hinder it. And I will not risk it.”
CHAPTER 13 Elizabeth, Awakening
Elizabeth awoke and continued to think about the lovely dream - that dream wherein he’d said,I love you. Even if you never accept me. I shall always love you.She lay in her bed while the household still slept and thought of nothing else. It felt so real, as if Darcy had been in this very room and spoken to her. As if…he’d held her against his chest. And fed her broth and put cups of tea to her lips. She felt his arms around her and heard his declarations of love (despite her atrocious rejection) and had come away from it feeling as if there was hope for them. But perhaps the whole thing had existed only in her mind. Perhaps her acute longing for a second chance had brought it about in her dreams. She sighed.It had seemed so real. How could it not be real?
She tried to sit up but had not the strength to do it. And she realised that she had become quite weak from all the time she’d spent in bed. Thankfully Charlotte and Jane soon came into the room and both prepared to assist her. She was bathed, and her hair was brushed and her beddings changed. Again she drank tea and ate broth, assisted by her friend and sister. Butshe recalled other, stronger, arms holding her up and she missed them. She missedhim, but realised that it must only have been an illusion. For how could Mr. Darcy of all people even gain entrance into her room, let alone be allowed to feed her and put his arms around her? Elizabeth realised dismally that she had fallen in love with a dream.
Nevertheless, once she had eaten, Elizabeth felt extremely lethargic and went to sleep again. She awoke several hours later and was told that several people had come to inquire after her health.
“The colonel, Anne and Mr. Bingley called earlier,” said Jane, sitting beside her and working on a piece of embroidery.
“Mr. Bingley is here?”
“Oh! Yes. He was actually the one who brought Dr. Stephens and myself from London - at Mr. Darcy’s request.”
“Mr. Darcy did that - had Mr. Bingley bring you and the doctor from London?”
“Yes, he did. Dr. Stephens is his own physician. It was most thoughtful and kind of Mr. Darcy to have thought of all of that.”
Elizabeth could hardly believe it - that Darcy would send for his own physician after she had berated him so viciously. But she only murmured, “Yes, it was very kind of him.”
Jane, on the other hand, wondered if she should bring up Elizabeth’s rejection of Mr. Darcy’s proposal. But her sister was still so fragile. And she did not wish to distress her in any way.
So she only said, “Perhaps you were wrong…to dislike him so much last fall.”
“Yes, perhaps,” murmured Elizabeth, noticing glumly that Mr. Darcy was not one of the persons who had called that day. Perhaps he no longer loved her. Perhaps her cruel refusal made him realise that he no longer wished to be her husband.And yet he had been kind enough to send for the doctor and her sister, and foster a reconciliation between Jane and Mr. Bingley.
