Page 114 of Legion
Her demon rolled its eyes.Honestly, Lou was a total man child.“Well, that’s just too bad.Luka’s my choice.You’ll have to accept that.”
“Why?”It was a genuine question.
“As my father, you’re supposed to be supportive.”
“You continue to expect reasonable reactions from me.I havenoidea why that is.We long ago established that I would always do outrageous things.”
Absolutely true.However ...“What other option do you havebutto accept this?”
Lou twisted his mouth, pensive.“I could drag him down to hell.”
Naomi stiffened.“Youpromisedyou wouldn’t do that to someone I care about ever again.I’m still traumatized by how you tossed poor Donatello into an abyss down there.”
Lou’s jaw tightened at the memory.“The little bastard bit me.”
She scoffed.“No he didn’t.”
“Yes he did!”
“He was a turtle.They don’t have teeth.”
Luka shifted slightly, drawing Lou’s attention.“Normally I wouldn’t care what anyone thought of Naomi and me claiming each other.But as you’re her father, I’ll give you the assurance you need.Still, I’m going to say this to you only once; whether you believe it or not is up to you.I’m not a good person.I’ve never tried to be.I’ve done nothing to deserve having something as good as Naomi in my life.Nonetheless, I’m keeping her.There’s not a single thing more important to me than she is.”
Lou pulled a face, flapping a hand.“Blah, blah, blah, words are cheap, blah.”
“Dad,” Naomi groaned.
“I’m not wrong,” he maintained, folding his arms.“I don’t believe him.And I don’t like him.And you can’t make me be nice to him.So there.”
“Your level of maturity is overwhelming.”
Lou squinted.“I detected a hint of sarcasm there.”
“Oh, it was no hint.It wasfull-onsarcasm.”Naomi put her hands on her hips.“Why would you find it so hard to believe that he cares about me?Are you saying I’m unlovable?”
Lou wagged his finger at her.“Don’t.Don’t start trying to talk me in circles.I’m too stoned for that shit, it’ll make me dizzy.”He crossed to her and rested his hands on her upper arms.“Listen to me, men are the worst.Pigs.Liars.Adulterers.We have no practical relevance other than to help ensure the propagation of our respective species.That’s it.That’s all we have to offer.”
“So what you’re saying is you’d prefer I was into women?”
“Celibacy,” he asserted.“Celibacy is the only avenue that leads to happiness.”
“Areyoucelibate?”
“No.But I wouldn’t know happiness if it took a steaming shit on my head, so we don’t need to worry about me.Only you.Just.You.”
Beyond exasperated at this point, Naomi said, “Maybe I should telepath Jolene and ask her to come over.She can help bring the tension down a few notches.”Or, more accurately, the Prime would annoy the crap out of him—they’d been frenemies for years.
Lou stilled, his mouth dropping open.“Oh, you’re diabolical.”
Naomi grinned.“Thank you.”
Releasing her arms, he dropped his own to his sides and let out a dramatic huff.“Is it so wrong that I want you to have a decent man in your life?”
“I thought you said all men are pigs.”
“There are some exceptions.You could find one easy.They’d flock to you because they’d sense you’re special.”
She snorted.“If I had a decent man anywhere in my general vicinity, you’d hate himbecausehe was decent.You’d say he was weak and boring and you’d throw things at him for fun.Tell me I’m wrong—and mean it.”
