Page 36 of Before the Bond
“Do you want me to read a book to you today?”
Jake remained distracted, but he nodded.
Even with his condition finding a moment of respite, I used every excuse I could find to stay by Jake’s side. I stayed past thenecessary hours, trying to convince myself that it was my way of making sure he didn’t relapse.
The truth was that focusing on work meant losing myself in things that made some form of sense. Business. Routine. No questions or emotions needed to play a part in this.
I didn’t need to feel bothered. I didn’t need to wonder.
I made peace with this already,I reminded myself.This is just how they are.
But there was always a “why”, wasn’t there?
Late afternoon, I went to the private library to return a book.
Caleb was there.
He was at the far window, his back to me. I could tell he recently came in. His jacket was damp from the mist, and I could see mud tracked onto his shoes. I even caught a few specks of it on his jaw.
Even standing still, his breathing was off. His hands fumbled with the pages of the new book he was reading, whereas before, he always handled them with ease.
He was tense from something. It wasn’t unlike when I first found him.
“Are you okay?” I asked.
Caleb turned.
“Olivia,” he finally registered. His surprise smoothed into composure, and he nodded. “Yes, I’m fine.”
“You don’t look fine,” I said. “How long were you out?”
Caleb’s brow furrowed. I pointed to his feet.
“Ah, yes,” he said. “Not long. Maintenance. The estate’s large, so we have a duty to maintain some of the forest areas. Falling branches, cracks in the road…”
“And you’re sure you’re okay?”
Caleb snapped his book shut. He tried to smile, but it didn't reach his eyes. “I am.”
I should have left, but I couldn’t help but linger.
Maybe it was what Elias said. Maybe it was the heavy atmosphere.
But whatever the case, I wanted to stay next to him.
“What’s wrong?” Caleb asked.
I realized I was staring at him.
I crossed the room before I thought about it. I stopped in front of him. Caleb stiffened, but he didn’t move away.
There was no fireplace in the library, but I could feel warmth radiating around me. My heartbeat was steady, but also louder in my ears. I noticed it matched the narrow rise and fall of Caleb’s chest.
“Nothing,” I murmured. My eyes lingered on Caleb’s face. I couldn’t look away.
I focused on the dirt on his jaw.
“There’s just a little something on your face…”
