Page 8 of Sainte
Sainte
I raise my hands in frustration and shake my head. It’s not worth running after her. The more I go after her, the more she’ll run. I’ve seen her kind before, and I’ll be damned if I’m gonna chase her. I turn and walk back to the clubhouse.She’ll be okay, I tell myself, but I’m not sure I’m convinced. I look back and watch her as she fades into the distance.I fucking hope she’ll be okay.
When I get to the clubhouse, I step inside and Ice looks up. He doesn’t have to say a word. I know what he wants. I shake my head.
“Fuck!” I hear him say quietly. I look at his office, and he nods, so I lead him that way. After coming in behind me, he closes the door behind him. “You didn’t catch up with her.”
I sit. “Oh, I caught up with her, and she told me in not so many words to mind my own fuckin’ business.” I rake my hands through my hair as Ice goes around his desk and sits.
“Dammit, Sainte, I’m worried about her. She’s a fucking loose cannon.” He leans back in his chair. “Do you think she’s using again?”
“You want the truth or do you want me to tell you what I think you want to hear?”
“Fuck! I thought so. She’s been so erratic since Hawk died. I knew she’d take it hard, but I swear I didn’t think she would go back to coke.”
“I guarantee it is where she is heading now.” I pull out my smokes and light one. I quit over a year ago, but that damn woman brings out the worst in me, and smoking takes the edge off. “Do you want me to go after her?”
Ice takes a sip of his drink and shakes his head. “No. As much as I want to help her, we can’t swoop in and save her every time she falls. She needs to hit rock bottom before she will ever consider trying to quit. Something will happen that will make her stop. We just have to be patient and wait for it. Then we go in and help her.”
“Aw man, Ice, you really think that’s the right way to go?”
He nods. “I do. She’s got to want help before any help we provide will actually sink in.” He rubs his temples, obviously trying to get rid of a headache. “I’ve known Honey a long time. She has so many things she is dealing with right now. Me, Hawk, you, and to top it off, she’s an addict. You do the math.”
I shake my head. “I just don’t get it.”
“It’s tough love, Sainte. She has to fall and hit rock bottom before she can work to pick herself back up. Then you, me and the club will be there to help her. Until then, we’ll just be enabling her, and I won’t be responsible for that.”
“And if she ODs?” I ask.
“That’s where you come in. If she’s following her last pattern, she’s not at risk of that for a while, but I’m counting on you to make sure it does not happen down the road. We love her. She’s an integral part of this club, and the last thing I want is to see her kill herself.”
“If you say so, boss.”
“And when she comes back here, and I know for a fact she will, she’s gonna be higher than a kite. You’re gonna be her babysitter.”
“Babysitter?”
He rolls his eyes. “You know what the fuck I mean. You keep tabs on her, and you don’t let her get away with any of her disruptive behavior. She needs to understand that if she wants to throw her life away, she can do it elsewhere. I have enough shit to deal with than a chick that can’t face her past and her mistakes and move on. And that’s exactly what this behavior all boils down to.”
I nod. “I got this. I’ll get her straight.”
“You’re the only one who can.”
“Speaking of shit going on, we really need to talk to Emma. You up for that now?”
“Not today. We can save that for when we get back from Mexico.”
I nod.
Chapter 3
Sainte
Why do I keep getting myself mixed up in this shit? Because I’m the fucking best, and everyone knows it. I thought life with the MC would be simpler, quieter. I thought I was done with these types of missions. Fuck that shit. It ain’t any different, but I know the MC has more promise for me. Ice and I go back a long way, and there are things I need to deal with in regard to Emma too, which is why I came back in the first place.
And oh, hell, I can’t forget the feisty Honey. That woman has enough piss and vinegar to make me hard every time I look at her. I know her heart is breaking now, but I guarantee I’m gonna have that woman begging for it. There is a story there, and I’m gonna make damn sure I get to the bottom of it. I’ll tear down her fucking walls. There’s no doubt about it.
The plane landed just outside of Nuevo Laredo. I’m supposed to have my men with me, Zach and Jake, but instead, sitting across from me are four members from my new biker family. “Michael is going to have my ass when he finds out you boys are here,” I say to them.
