Page 60 of Malachai
"I'm going to leave now," I said.
"Why? We were still talking." He paused. "You know what your problem is?" he asked.
I said nothing.
"You think being needed is the same thing as being loved." He tilted his head. "That girl associates you with survival. Fear. Intensity. You mistake that dependency for devotion."
I stared at him.
"And you," I said. "You mistake attention for connection."
His eyes narrowed slightly.
I turned toward the door. My hand was on the knob when his voice followed me.
"Tell Midnight I said hi, Malachai. I'll see her for lunch in a few days."
I didn't answer. I opened the door, walked out, and let it close behind me. Cooly had just told me he wanted to die. Who would I be not to oblige him?
Chapter 32
Indigo
I shouldn’t have said yes to lunch again. This was damn near ten times in the month he’d shown up. I had told myself when Diamond was gone I’d make an excuse to say no. Diamond had to rush back home last week because Malik was losing his shit without her up north.
But he had shown up at the studio with a massive bouquet of white peonies—my absolute favorite, the exact ones I used to buy for myself back in New York.
He’d looked at me and said, “Come eat with me, Midnight. Just lunch. I miss your company, plus I’ll be leaving soon.”
I told myself it was harmless.
We ended up at a Black-owned spot downtown in Tampa. Cooly pulled out my chair, then sat across from me looking entirely too good in a crisp black button-down with the sleeves rolled up. His locs were loose today, framing his face. His gaze never once left mine.
What was I doing? I did not need to be adding to my issues. Me and Malachai were just getting back to some sense of normalcy, or whatever the hell that looked like for us. If he found out I was spending days with Cooly, he’d freak the fuck out. But a spiteful, bitter little voice in the back of my head whispered that he could just deal with it. He’d told me to ignore Sasha for years. He could ignore my friendship with Cooly the exact same way.
“I watchedNaked and Afraidlike you told me to,” he said, his lips twitching into a slow smile. “Two episodes. That shit is wild. They really out there eating raw snake and crying over fire. That’s not your dream anymore, right?” His eyes dragged down my body for half a second before coming back up to lock onto mine. “Because if you still wanna be on that island, I’ll buy you one. Private. No cameras. Just you, me, and whatever the fuck you feel like being naked about.”
I laughed before I could stop myself. “You’re ridiculous.”
“Nah. I’m serious.” He leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table. “I’d watch you survive. I’d watch you thrive. I’d watch you do whatever the hell you want, as long as I get to watch. I can make you afraid if you want to be, in all the ways that make your heart race and your thighs wet. I’d chase you through the jungle. Pin you down.”
I cleared my throat and readjusted in my seat, not daring to put any real thought behind the words he’d just said. “Change the subject,” I commanded.
He laughed, opening his mouth to say something, but luckily, our food arrived.
I’d ordered the ribeye, medium-rare. Before I could even pick up my knife, Cooly reached over, slid my plate in front of him, and started cutting the steak into neat, bite-sized pieces like it was the most natural thing in the world.
I froze.
He didn’t even look up as he did it. When he was entirely done, he slid the heavy plate back across the table to me, then wiped his hands on a linen napkin like he hadn’t just done something that felt way too intimate for two people who weren’t fucking.
I didn’t know what to say.
“Have you told Malachai about these lunches?” he asked before I could find my voice.
I shook my head. “No.”
He studied my face for a long second. “He gonna have a problem with it?”
