Page 28 of Nansar
"But I never got the chance. He grabbed me right off the street near my apartment before I could investigate." Even now, the violation of it made my stomach turn. "Declan Hewes.The richest man on Earth. Billions in wealth, connections that stretch to every corner of the globe like a spider's web. Power that made him untouchable. He had spies everywhere—probably even in the Bureau itself."
Nansar's arms tightened fractionally around me, a wordless vow of protection that I felt in my bones.
"He smuggled me out of the US—my country—to another home he owned in São Paulo, Brazil. Far from anyone who might look for me. Far from anyone who'd even know where to start." My voice flattened, went distant. It was the only way I could force the words out. "He kept me there like a pet. Dressed me up in expensive clothes, dripping with jewelry. At first, he just made me sit through dinners with him. Hours of pretending I was there by choice, that I was his willing companion. Like I was some kind of doll he could pose and display. His prize."
The breeze picked up, carrying the scent of alien grass and distant flowers. I focused on that—on anything but the memories clawing their way through my mind.
"Then one night, after dinner..." My voice dropped. "He tried to rape me."
Every muscle in Nansar's body turned to stone.
"But I was Navy before I was FBI. They taught me how to fight, how to survive. How to hurt someone who tries to hurt you." A bitter smile twisted my lips. "I beat the absolute shit out of him. Broke his nose. Maybe a rib or two. Felt his blood on my knuckles and thought—thought maybe I'd won. I tried to run, but there were too many guards. They dragged me back kicking and screaming."
My breathing was coming faster now, shallower. Nansar's hand moved from my hair to cup my cheek, his thumb brushing away a tear that had escaped without my permission.
"He left me alone after that. For weeks. I thought..." I laughed, but it came out shattered, all jagged edges. "I thoughtmaybe he'd realized I wasn't worth the trouble. That I'd proven I'd rather die than let him touch me. I was so stupid."
More tears were burning behind my eyes now, hot and insistent.
"Then one night after dinner, I noticed this cloud of dust coming through the AC vents—air conditioning, it cools the air. I didn't think anything of it at first. Just dust. Just nothing." My voice dropped to barely a whisper, each word an agony. "But then... God, then my body started burning. Like someone had lit a fire under my skin. I was horny as hell, desperate, aching. And when Declan came in, when he offered, when he asked..."
The words stuck in my throat.
"I climbed him like a tree." The admission tore something open inside me, something that had been festering. "I begged him. I did things I would never, ever—"
I couldn't finish. Couldn't force out the rest.
A sob wrenched itself from my chest, violent and raw, and Nansar's arms tightened around me like he could physically hold the broken pieces together.
"He kept it up. Once, twice, three times a week. The dust would come through the vents, and then he'd walk in, and I'd..." Shame burned through me, hot and acidic, eating me alive from the inside. "I was enthusiastic. Desperate for it. For him. My body would betray me even when my mind was screaming against what was happening. He made me do depraved things. Things I can't even say out loud. Things that replay in my head every night when I try to sleep."
The tears were flowing freely now, carving hot paths down my cheeks.
"He shared me with other men. Other women. Passed me around like a party favor while I smiled and moaned and begged for more. Always drugged. Always helpless. Always betrayed by my own body."
I was shaking now, trembling so hard I thought I might fly apart.
"The things I did..." My voice broke completely, splintering into pieces. "The things I let them do to me... They shame me. Every single day. Every single moment. I can't escape it. Can't wash it off. Can't pretend it didn't happen."
A ragged breath tore through me.
"The only thing that kept me sane was my hate." The words came out raw and bleeding, scraped from the deepest part of me. "Every time the drug wore off and I realized what I'd done, what I'd begged for, what I'd become... I hated him more. I hated myself. But mostly him. That hate was the only thing that was still mine. The only thing he couldn't drug away or steal or twist into something else. It was all I had left."
Nansar's whole body went rigid beneath me. When he spoke, his voice was rough as gravel, barely controlled.
"Mumje." The word came out like a curse, like poison on his tongue. "He used mumje on you."
I pulled back slightly to look at his face. His features had transformed—stricken, twisted with a horror so profound it seemed to age him in seconds. And beneath that horror, something that looked dangerously like guilt.
"What?"
"The dust you described." His jaw clenched so hard I heard his teeth grind. A muscle ticked in his cheek like a warning signal. "It's mumje. A drug from my world. It strips away a person's will. Makes them... compliant. Eager to please." His voice dropped to something darker, more haunted. "It doesn't just remove resistance—it creates desire where there should be none. It turns your own body into a traitor."
The way he said it made my stomach twist into knots. He knew. He knew exactly what it did, understood the violation ina way that went beyond sympathy or imagination. This was the knowledge of someone who'd seen its effects firsthand.
"How do you—"
"I'm so sorry, Chloe." His voice cracked like breaking ice. "When I worked with Ambassador Yaard, I was involved in the mumje mining operation on a Gilese moon." He closed his eyes as if the memory physically pained him, his expression tortured. "I had no idea about Hewes. No idea the drug was being transported to Earth. If I had known what he was doing to you—"
