Page 79 of No Easy Catch
Color left my face and I stumbled for words. But he laughed and said, “I’m messing with you. Get out of here, go talk to Amber and try and enjoy your senior season.”
“Yes, sir.”
My breathing came out heavier, as if I’d sprinted around the bases, as I walked to my car.Is this why I’m acting like an idiot? Amber? Is this a fucking heartbreak?
Yes.
I knew the answer but had avoided thinking about it all week because it hurt. She was the first person I thought about when I woke up, and anytime something happened, whether it was funny or stupid, I wanted to tell her. I missed her smile and sleeping next to her…Fuck.
I had to talk to her. Before starting the car, I typed out ten different messages to send her first but stopped. She might not respond or want to respond and I didn’t want to chance it. Instead, I sped toward her place, parked and made my way to her house. It was dark out for a spring evening, but the weather had finally warmed up enough to not freeze to death. It didn’t matter now though—sweat dripped down my back as my nerves grew.
I didn’t know what to say and didn’t think about it until I knocked on the door. Amber answered and looked so goddamn beautiful in a simple off-the-shoulder black sweater and jeans. Emotions rushed through my body—the need to hold her, protect her, promise her I’d never be an idiot again—but none of that came out in words.
“I miss you,” I said, trying to gauge her reaction to seeing me. She looked sad, but not the same way I felt inside. It was like a little of the light had left her eyes and I hated knowing I had a part in that. “I’m fucking sorry and I hope you can forgive me and I want to hold you, sleep next to you again, tell you all the dumb shit that happens all the time, talk about the future with you, and?—”
“Jeff,” she interrupted and I swore a small smile played on her lips. “Do you want to come inside?”
“Yes. Yes please. I do.”
Like I had done many times before, I walked past her and was struck by how much I loved how she smelled. It was a mixture of comfort and enticement and I put my hands in my pockets to prevent myself from hugging the shit out of her. “Uh, should I stay in the living room or?—?”
“We can talk upstairs.” Her tone sounded happy and I took that as a good sign. We went up the stairs and into her room, where she sat on the edge of her bed and left me to stand in front of her, pacing and trying to find the right words.
“Amber…look.” My throat got tight and I knelt on the floor so I could place my hands on each of her knees. She didn’t push them away and I was so fucking glad. She looked up at me with her dark eyes and long lashes, and my chest physically hurt at the amount of emotion I felt for her. Suddenly, I knew what to say. “I’ve never had a relationship before, not like one we had…have. Not like one we have. This all-consuming feeling where I think about you constantly…it’s insane. It’s new to me and whenthe thing with my coach came out…I refused to see anything but the fact you lied.”
“You have to know why I did, though.” Her voice sounded so sad. I moved my hands up to her face and ran my thumbs over her soft cheeks.
“I do. I really do, but I’m an idiot and it took a bit of time. I didn’t realize the hurt and anger I’ve been carrying around was actually my own fault.” I swallowed, hard, and went for it. This was the girl who thought on her feet, who supported me when I told her my real dreams, made me laugh, who turned me on like no other and shared the excitement about the unknowns of the future. “I’m pretty sure I’m in love with you. The crazy, can’t sleep, want to be near you all the time love and it’s terrifying.”
“It is, isn’t it?” she replied, a smile growing on her face when she reached out and mirrored my position with her hands on my face. “That’s why I agreed to keep something from you. Because Idolove you and couldn’t stand the thought of something happening to you during your senior year.”
“What do I have to do to get you back?” My voice cracked.
“I never left, but some groveling would work,” she teased. She ran her fingers through my hair and I moaned at her touch. “Relationships are new to me, too, and I’m probably going to mess up at some point.”
“I’ll forgive you.” I brought my lips to her mouth, the sensation of finally kissing her setting off an explosion inside me. She tasted so damn sweet and warm and she opened her mouth and slid her tongue inside mine, bringing my tender kiss to fiery real quick. She bit down on my bottom lip, dragged her teeth over it and the urge to be naked with her was almost animalistic. “I take it I’m forgiven?”
“Um,” she said, reaching to the edge of my shirt and pulling it over my head. “It depends.”
“Name it and I’ll do it.” I fumbled with the edge of her sweater, wanting to see her skin and touch every inch of her. She was braless, typical of her, and I leaned her back onto the bed so I could lick each breast just how she liked. “Fuck, I missed your body.”
“Show me.”
Oh, I can do that.I grinned and sucked one nipple hard into my mouth, circling it to the point she squirmed beneath me. Then I did the other and licked from her neck to her belly button, not giving her a chance to catch her breath. “I love how soft your skin is, and how good it always tastes.”
She moaned and I undid her jeans and slid them down along with her panties to expose her sex. Here she was, my girl, legs spread wide for me to show her how much I missed her. I inserted two fingers and pumped her for a couple minutes before adding my mouth to the mix. She pulled at my hair and whined my name when I flicked my tongue against her clit at the pace that brought her to climax. She rode out the orgasm, her legs bucking around my head as I held her down. When she stilled, I kissed the inside of each thigh. “So fucking perfect.”
She sighed and looked at me with sated eyes. Pride filling me because I damn well knew I did that to her. “You’re halfway to being forgiven.”
“Well then, I’ll put in more work.” I bent down again, but she stilled.
“No, I want you inside me. I missed your body, too. The way it felt against mine.” The way she said it was like a sucker punch to the heart. It was so sweet and innocent, as if she had never said those words to anyone else in the world, and I wanted to pound my chest like a caveman.
The pace changed when I slid out of my practice shorts and rushed to put on a condom. This wasn’t rushed. This was showing her how much I cared for her. I took my time, kissingher and teasing her neck before gliding into her. But I didn’t go fast. I went real slow and waited until her gaze landed on me. “I love you, Amber. I want more of this with you as long as you’ll have me.”
She blinked back some moisture before she nodded with a huge smile on her face. “I love you, too. Just promise me you won’t disappear again. Even if you’re mad. I can’t have that again. You’ve become one of my best friends.”
The words tortured me as much as they comforted me and I promised her. I promised to always be honest, just as I started thrusting into her. I promised to never go that long without talking again, just before I nipped her ear. And I promised to do everything I could to never hurt her.
