Page 99 of Shy Girls Can't Date Rockstars
“Okay?”
“You haven’t fawned over me. You haven’t tried to use me for clout. You’ve barely wanted to acknowledge my existence.”
My turn to whisper a laugh. “And that’s all positive in your book?”
“You’ve kept standing at school, even though I made it hellish for you. Believe me, I’m gonna set everyone straight on Monday.”
I wave off the suggestion. “Don’t bother. I don’t want any friends at that school.”
“They might not be all fake.”
“I’m just not interested. The thought of it is too exhausting.”
“What about me? Is being around me too exhausting?”
Looking up at him, I study his features. “Kinda.”
His posture droops as he laughs. “Brutal.”
“Well, it’s the truth. I never know what I’m going to get with you. You flip from kind to cruel like it’s nothing.”
Hesitation creeps across his face. “That’s how you see me?”
I nod boldly.
He blows out a breath and rests his hands on his hips. “I guess I’m glad you saw me as kind some of the time.”
I try for a joke. “Sorry if it messes up the rockstar image you’re trying to cultivate.”
He smirks, striking a goofy pose. “Trying? Girl, I’m already a rockstar.”
I find myself smiling. “I know you are.”
He drops the facade and takes a quick breath in. “Are we good?”
I nod. “I hope so.”
“I’ll take hope.”
I rub my hand across my chest and notice the racing of my heart. “Ryder, how did you know that breathing technique?”
“Huh?”
“The other day in the library, when I had that panic attack… Yesterday in the rain… You knew about the four counts. Where did you learn that?”
“My mom.” He takes my hand and guides me back to the stool, gesturing for me to take a seat. “I told you she was studying to become a nurse. She really helped me through my stage fright when I was doing solo open mic nights.”
Ryder watches me, sitting on the stool and rubbing my aching chest.
“You want to do it together?” he offers. “Ready? Inhale for four…” I breathe in sync with him. “Hold.” I focus on the broadness of his shoulders until his chest deflates. “Out for four.”
I breathe out, feeling slightly more relaxed as tingles race down my arms. “Your mom must be pretty great.”
He nods, standing in front of me. “She is. I miss her a lot.”
“Have your parents come here to visit?”
“No, it’s pretty far and they can’t take the time off work.” Ryder shrugs. “Maybe for the showcase?”
