Page 3 of Affliction
Fighting to keep the tears back is getting harder and harder, and finally the damn breaks. She reaches across the table, taking my shaky hand in hers and her eyes soften. The warmth of her hand on mine immediately soothes me, and I feel my shoulders relax. Swallowing past the lump, I lift my watery eyes to hers.
“You don't need to thank me. Just keep yourself safe, and go live your life—the way you want to live it. For no one else but you. You deserve that.”
Live my life, for no one else but myself.
Chapter two
Two years later
“Can I get aLong Island please?” The young girl on the other side of the bar asks. Giving her a nod, I grab everything I need off the back wall. Gin, tequila, white rum, vodka and triple sec go into the glass before I top the beverage off with some cola from the fountain, and a lemon. Offering her a smile, I slide the drink over and she drops a twenty on the bartop then saunters off toward her group of friends.
I started working at Doc’s two months after I arrived here in Oregon. The bar is named in homage to the owner's grandfather, whose nickname was Doc. He was a very loved and respected man in this area, even after he passed away ten years ago. Out in the middle of nowhere, the building sits at the edge of the forest and if you don’t know where you’re going you might miss it. The once dark brown siding now faded, and the roof is about ready to be replaced. Neon signs fill up the large window that sits next to the front door advertising different types of alcohol we serve. The open sign that lights up the smaller window to the left of the door flickers andthe “O” no longer works. It doesn’t look like much but to the regulars, this is their very ownCheers. Everyone knows your name.
Four nights a week I sit behind the bar and watch as seemingly nice people turn into the biggest douchebags over the dumbest things–I hate alcohol and what it does to people. Last week we had to throw out a couple guys who got into a fight—over what, I have no idea. They came in together laughing and the more they drank, the angrier one of them got. One of them threw a punch and that was it. Fists were flying, some of the other customers tried to help break it up and one of them got elbowed in the face. What started with two, ended in four bloody noses, and even more black eyes.
All in all though, it’s not a bad place to work. The owner takes care of us and the money makes the shit show worth it. I let out a sigh and look up at the clock–only a couple more hours and I can go home and get some rest. I don’t mind working a double but I’ve picked up a couple of Ashlynn’s shifts this week and the lack of sleep is starting to wear me down. Tonight is one of those nights.
She owes me big time.
The last two hours pass in a blur and the bar is busier than usual.Thankfully, nothing too crazy happened and no one had to be kicked out. Most of the people here are regulars, but I do see a lot of new faces from time to time.
Just another night.
“Goodnight, Leroy, get home safe. See you next week.” I say to one of said regulars as he walks out to the parking lot and grumbles a shortbyein response. I lock the door and turn back towards the bar to clean up. More than ready to crawl into my bed, I want to get these closing chores done quickly.
I grab my phone and hit shuffle through my rock playlist until I find the right song to fill the silence. Music fills the air as I begin to pick up the empty glasses and wipe down the bar top and tables. This has become a closing ritual of sorts for me, and it helps me unwind after a long night.
This is the only time I really feel like myself–my real self. No one I work with knows who I really am. Not my real name, not where I come from, and not the things I had to do to get here. I’m grateful for that. However, lately I find myself wishing I didn’t have to hide. I miss my home; I miss Uncle Nick. I haven’t spoken to him since the day he helped me leave, but I wish I could.
Stepping back behind the bar I begin washing the dishes as the song changes toAshes of Edenby Breaking Benjamin. My hand slows and I get lost in the lyrics.
Five years old
“Uncle Nick!” I squeal as my favorite person, besides my mommy and daddy, comes walking inside with a bag of presents. Presents just for me!
“Hey Princess! Merry Christmas!” His big voice booms and he scoops me up and hugs me so tight.
“Merry Christmas! Mommy he’s here can we open presents now?” I ask.
Mommy giggles then shakes her head as daddy kisses her on the cheek.
“Not yet kiddo we have to have dinner first remember?” Daddy smiles at me and his blue eyes sparkle like the lights on our big Christmas tree when he looks at me.
Pouting as Uncle Nick puts me down,he bends his knees and looks right at me. “How about you open this one before we eat, Lizzy?” He pulls a present out from the bag and shows it to me.
I smile so big and bounce up and down. “Yes, please!” I take the small box from his hands and look at it. It has pretty snowflakes on it and a purple bow—my favorite color.
I carefully open the paper to see a little purple box. I peek up at Uncle Nick and see him smiling with Mommy and Daddy behind him, hugging each other as they watch me. I open the box and inside is a pretty necklace.
It’s a heart!
“Here, let me show you.” He says and opens the heart.
Inside is a picture of me, Mommy and Daddy on one side, then me and Uncle Nick on the other. They’re pictures from the beach trip we went on over the summer, before I started kindergarten this year.
“It’s so pretty, I love it so much! Thank you!” I say as I hug him and Mommy comes to put it on me, kissing the top of my head when she’s done.
I’m never taking this necklace off, it’s the best gift ever.
