Page 121 of Call You Mine
One.
Two.
Three.
“And there we are,” the technician says as a tiny, bean-like blob becomes clearer, and a gasp escapes my lips, my counting forgotten as a loud thumping noise sounds through the speakers.
“Wow,” Anderson breathes, and I look over to find hisother hand coming to his mouth, his eyes staring directly at the screen.
“And there’s our heartbeat.” The technician holds the probe against my stomach, pushing in harder than I expected, but I don’t care.
I stare at the screen, feeling an overwhelming rush of love that I didn’t know was possible. It’s like I can almost feel my brain rewiring, my priorities shifting, my nervous system reinventing itself—all with the purpose of keeping this tiny little life safe.
Because that’s the baby’s heartbeat.
Mybaby’s heartbeat.
I turn to find Anderson watching me, and a tear falls down his cheek. That easy smile curls on his lips just before he brings our interlocked hands to his mouth, pressing a kiss to the back of my hand.
Ourbaby’s heartbeat.
“Eleven weeks,” I say, more to myself than to Anderson as I hold one of the ultrasound pictures.
The technician put me just under twelve weeks before printing out a line of photos and sending us back to the waiting room for our appointment with one of the doctors here at the practice.
There have been so many emotions in just the half hour since we got here, and I find myself feeling almost numb to them now—like my body needs a moment to reset.
It’s not a bad sensation, and I’m thankful for the reprieve, allowing myself just to focus on the picture of this baby in my hand. A real, tangible photo of the life growing inside of me right now.
It’s sort of a mindfuck.
With this pregnancy being unplanned—pretty much thedefinition ofaccidental—there has been so much back and forth on what to do. Ultimately, I decided I wanted to go through with this pregnancy, for no other reason than it’s whatIwanted to do. But it wasn’t until those few seconds before we heard the heartbeat that I realized how much I wanted it.
Not only did I feel a love for this baby when we heard the heartbeat, but I think my love for Anderson rooted deeper inside of me, too.
When I looked over at him, the astonishment on his face as he watched the screen, I knew there is one else I’d rather do this with.
He wears his heart on his sleeve and shows how fiercely he loves through every single one of his actions—I see it with Georgie; I see it with our friends; I see it with me.
And I can’t wait for the day I get to see him do it with our child.
“Ava Montgomery has a nice ring to it,” Anderson says as we head back out to the waiting room.
I smile to myself, then glance toward the nurse’s station before looking back at him.“I think so, too.”
He nods absentmindedly, like he’s stuck in his own head. “How did they even mix up your last name? Isn’t your full name on our insurance? I’m surprised you didn’t correct them.”
“Why would I?” I ask, brushing my shoulders against his as we walk, lowering my voice just enough to make it feel like a secret.
That gets his attention, and he stops midstep
His brows pull together, confusion flickering across his face.
I tilt my head, watching it slowly start to click for him—but not quite all the way. “There’s no need to.”
There’s a beat.
Then another.
