Page 127 of Ruthless Ambition
“You love it.” He tilted his head back and closed his eyes.
“I don’t,” I said, but I knew he could hear my smile.
“Owen got the exclusive. It’s on ESPN tonight,” he told me.
“Joy. Exactly what I need, my drama on TV,” I sighed. “How’s Ronnie?”
“You and that kid,” Cooper grumbled. “The kid’s a little weirdo who fucked you over.”
“Is he okay?”
“He’s fine. He got a psych eval, and he’s to see a therapist.” Cooper’s look told me what he thought of that.
“Will was always a nice guy,” I said as I plucked at my bedcover. “You know, nice, well spoken—”
“Potential pedophile.”
“I didn’tknowthat, Coop.” I paused. “And Judd was older.”
“But was he when he started on him? He’s grooming young kids and forcing them into a relationship, the guy’s a pedophile.”
“We don’t know that for certain,” I corrected him.
Cooper thought about it. “True. Still a sick, twisted fuck.”
“Agreed.”
We sat in silence, and I thought Cooper had fallen asleep when he spoke quietly, making me jump. “This isn’t your fault.”
“I feel like it is,” I admitted.
“I know, but it isn’t.” He opened one eye to look at me. “You did nothing wrong. Will Hershman was fucking up that boy’s life long before you ever came into it. He coerced him into a relationship, he told him he wasn’t good enough, he fed the same lies to Burt and Ronnie as he did Judd.”
I wiped away the tear that spilled over. “I know.”
“Then stop analyzing it.”
“Okay.”
He closed his eyes again. “You’re a shit liar, Balan.”
“I know.”
I saw his smile, and we were quiet. It was all such a mess.
Judd Christie had been involved with Will, they had explained to me, but still, I struggled with it. Will had been excited when I took an interest in Judd, but then he was scared because I knewhim. Scared that I would mess up his life by telling people he was homosexual. A fact he had kept hidden. Which was sad because there was no need to. Will, fearing for his reputation, encouraged Judd to act out more and more. As the police looked deeper into it, more doubt was cast on whether Judd was as willing in their relationship as they first thought.
When I decided Judd and I wouldn’t fit well, Will was there to tell Judd why he was a failure. Judd hit Ryan Carmichael in the car that night. His own guilt and his own demons had led him to a dark place and later a tragic death.
My heart broke for Judd Christie, and I still felt like I had let him down.
When Will went to see a college basketball game at his little sister’s college, he recognized Ryan as being the son of the driver of the car Judd had hit and inevitably killed himself over.
I didn’t think we’d ever understand what happened to Will. Cooper was calling it a psychotic break, but when Will had called me to look at Ryan, they thought he snapped when I agreed. Either the fact that I had gone or the fact that I was willing to sign Ryan, when I had rejected Judd, broke him.
He vowed revenge on me and dragged in Judd’s father. A lowlife who had no connection with his sons, but Will had told him that I was the one driving the car, not Judd, and I was responsible for his death. Burt Christie was in it for the blackmail opportunity. He never knew his son’s relationshipwith Will and had been willing to believe that Will was merely incensed over the loss of such a potential star.
Ronnie had been told a watered-down version, and I knew they were asking if Will had moved on to him. I was scared that he would have, which is why Will had been able to get him to play along.
