Page 142 of Booked on You
“No, I mean it. You look exhausted.” She leans forward. “What’s going on?”
“I haven’t been able to sleep.”
“Since when?”
“Wednesday night. I keep tossing and turning. It’s awful.” I press my fingers against my temples, trying to ease the headache. “I swear, I can hear my neighbors breathing through the walls, Hallie. My upstairs neighbor vacuums at seven every morning like she’s trying to wake the dead. There are no trees. No birds. Just concrete, noise, and people everywhere. Has it always been like this?”
She bursts into laughter. “Welcome to New York, babe. And yes, it’s always been like this. The only thing that’s changed is you.”
The barista calls Hallie’s name, and she gets up to grab my drink. Her iced matcha sits on the table. When she returns, she sets my espresso in front of me and studies my face.
“This isn’t just about the apartment,” she says.
“No.” I wrap my hands around the cup and look around, making sure no one is paying attention to us. “It’s about Ezra. I miss him.”
“Then why are you here?”
“Because my life is here. My career. My agent, my editor, and my publicist. You.” Tears start, and I wipe at them angrily. “Because picking up and moving to Charleston for a guy I’ve known for weeks is a bit insane.”
“Who cares?” She tilts her head. “Staying here when you’re miserable is a choice.”
My emotions are starting to take over. “I have to decide whether I’m going to renew my lease or let it go by the last day of the month. When I think about staying here, it makes me physically ill. It feels so wrong.”
She nods, listening to me.
“Ezra is so kind. He doesn’t bring it up, just says how much he misses me. He’s giving me space to decide, and it’s killing me because I don’t know what to do. What if I pack up my entire life and move to Charleston and it doesn’t work out? Then what?”
“I think your overactive imagination is making you stressed. How about this—you move and it doesn’t work out, you can come back and stay with me until you figure it out. Or your parents would love to have you home for a little while. There are options, Scar. But not pursuing this when the two of you look so fucking happy is insanity. He seems like everything you’ve ever wanted.”
“He is.” I take a shaky breath, and my chest aches. “I’m just so scared he’s going to wake up one day and realize being with me is a mistake.”
Hallie is quiet for a long moment. Then she reaches across the table and takes my hand. Her grip is firm.
“Scarlett. Look at me.”
I meet her eyes.
“You’ve been back two days and you’ve obsessed about Charleston. When you were there, I could hear the happiness in your voice.” She squeezes my hand. “You light up when you talk about him. Your whole demeanor changes. I’ve never seen you like this with anyone. Not even Jason, and you thought he was the love of your life.”
“I won’t survive the heartbreak of losing Ezra, Hal. I know I won’t. That scares me. After Jason, I experienced the worst depression of my life. This would be next-level,” I whisper.
“I know, but you can’t really walk away now, can you?” Her voice softens.
“No.” I shake my head.
“You spent the two years after Jason barely surviving, protecting yourself, and staying small so you wouldn’t get hurt again. You stopped taking risks. You stopped believing good things could happen to you.” She leans forward. “Then you went to Charleston for a couple of weeks and wrote the best book of your career.”
My eyes widen. “Wait, did you finish reading it?”
Her entire face lights up. “Oh my fucking gosh, yes, at around three this morning! It was the best thing I’veeverread. It’s so damn special, Scarlett. Like, that man must’ve done something right. I can tell you’re in love with someone who actually sees you. That means something. People search their entire life for love like that.”
“I know,” I say, and my voice cracks.
“I cried tears of happiness when I got to the end.” Hallie smiles. “Jordan is incredible. It’s the most honest, vulnerable thing you’ve ever written. You didn’t hold anything back. You letyourself feel everything, and it shows on every page. And the sex scenes?Hot.”
She squeezes my hand before letting go.
“I think if you don’t go back and see how it goes, you’ll regret it for the rest of your life. If you stay here and renew your lease, you’ll be miserable. And it’s not worth it, Scarlett. Live a little.”
