Page 85 of Pucking Them
Bingo.
“This isn’t about me.”
“I’ve had mental skills coaching before and it wasn’t like this."
“Obviously it wasn’t effective.” There is an edge to her voice now.
“It’s not as if I’ve led my team to the Conference Finals,” I drawl. “How effective does it need to be?”
When Olivia leans forward in her seat like she is finally about to launch herself out of the water for her ambush, I stiffen. “Tell me, D’Angelo, do you truly believe that the Bay Rebels have reached this level of success because ofyou? How many years have your team been calledmisfitsandlosers, while you were the captain? Yet this season you finally make the playoffs. What changed?”
I wet my dry lips.
What’s changed?
Shay and Eden. Robyn returning to Freedom. Finally learning what true love and support feels like and then being able to offer that to the rest of the team and staff as well.
But it wasn’t me.
“Who is the highest scorer?” Olivia presses.
“Shay,” I reply, quietly.
Suddenly, the room is suffocating.
I can taste phantom blood on my tongue and feel Bruno’s fist pummeling me to the floor.
Mom…Dad…save me!
I jerk, trying to shock myself back to the present.
I snatch up the paperwork, folding and refolding it to calm myself.
“What would happen to the team if you simply weren’t there?” Olivia’s voice is harder than it was before.
I flinch, caught between my bruised and terrified past and the present, where she is tearing me down.
I feel fucking small.
Why am I needed?
Is coach right about me? Is this why I need him to be a hard-ass with me? I was a fucking mess when he took me under his wing. I would have self-destructed without him.
“Would the Bay Rebels have failed to make the playoffs?” Olivia slaps her palm on the table, and I jump. “Couldn’t literally any other captain have led a team with a star player like Shay?”
“They need me.” I can’t stop folding the paper.
I am breathing too fast.
I must get out of here.
When I abruptly stand, however, Olivia calls after me.
“It didn’t look that way in your recent games, which is why coach fired the other staff and brought me in full-time. I suppose that makes ityourfault that they’re gone. Is that why you see yourself as thedevil? Why you feel guilty?”
This is my fault…?
Feeling sick, I spin back to Olivia.
