Page 168 of Pucking Them
I wish that she would slam her hand over my mouth and control whether I can breathe.
I would give her that.
Everything.
My eyes are wide and open.
I have never exposed this much to anyone.
“Youaresmart.” Robyn clenches her hand around my throat, once and then twice. I clutch her shoulders, dragging her closer. I need to feel her breath against my skin and smell her sweet scent. “I love that about you.”
“But…” I haven’t told anyone this.No one.Yet if I am trusting Robyn with my heart, mind, body, and soul 24/7, then I should trust her with this. “I was not only the scholar and best in my year but…my professor spent my entire degree pressuring me to drop hockey. He offered me a PhD to work under him as his research apprentice. He’s this big name in the field, and it was a huge opportunity. I didn’t tell Dee.”
“Why?” Robyn demands, shocked. “Did you want to become a scientist? A professor? That was an amazing break.”
I wet my dry lips.
I still don’t know. I love playing hockey.
But it wasn’t like I’d been free to choose.
This is the tough part.
My brother would die for me. But I would sacrifice for him too.
I never wanted him to know what I gave up because I’ve been burdened my entire bloody life with the blood, bruises, and screams of my twin. I’ve been haunted by what Eden suffered for me. So, I never wanted to make him feel like he was indebted to me.
It fucks with your head.
“Hockey belongs to both of us,” I reply. “Can you understand what we were like back then? We needed to sleep in the sameroom. We couldn’t be parted. Jude and you have helped us both so bloody much. We are our own people now in a way that we weren’t back then. We clung to each other because it was the only way we knew to be safe and survive. But hockey was my brother’s voice.His freedom.It’s more than a sport. Dad told me when I was a kid to look out for Dee, and I always will. I couldn’t ruin his chances selfishly or break us apart like that. It would have wrecked him. Dee believes that he is my shadow but he’s not.We’re each other’s.Finding Jude and you, however, has magicked a way for us to exist in the sun.”
Robyn slides her hand up from my throat to stroke my cheek. “And you think that you’re not worthy…? You’re fuckinggood. I see both of you, Eden and Shay, your own people who should be proud of who you are. I’m sorry you lost that opportunity.”
I turn my head, kissing the palm of her hand. “I didn’t lose it. I gave it up for my brother. It was easy in the end because nothing is more important than family.Real family.Don’t tell Dee, yeah?”
She nods.
I start to slow dance with Robyn again, resting my cheek against her warm head.
I consider opening my jeans and letting out my cock, before edging Robyn’s dress up and fucking her, slow and deep, while we dance.
Yet holding her like this, dancing in silence under the stars, is better.
Romantic.
My cock may be hard and unsatisfied. Simply holding my lover in my arms, however, and knowing that she’s not on this date to use me as a fucktoy but because she wants to spend time with me…dance with me…whisper confessions under the stars…fills me with joy.
Nobody has treated me with this respect.
I feel like a proper lover.
My lips curve into a smile on top of Robyn’s head. I drop a kiss onto her soft hair.
I will do anything to earn the permanent collar and my place in Robyn and D’Angelo’s world — an eternity of moonlit dances.
First, I must win the game tomorrow.
Since I abandoned my chance of becoming a legend in those stars, then I must become a legendary star on the ice.
