Page 9 of Willowbrooke
Things remained stagnant in my relationship, and whileI would never dream of cheating on a partner, it didn’t escape my notice that my thoughts kept drifting to what being in a relationship with Leo would be like. The more I got to know him, the more he opened up to me, the more information I craved.
I hadn’t ever felt that hunger for knowledge with Adam. He had always been so transparent to me, despite his best efforts to hide behind his well-manicured appearance and tailored suits. But so much of Leo remained an enigma, luring me into what was surely a trap within the stuffy confines of Willowbrooke.
“What’s our first stop again?” Leo asked, bringing me crashing out of my reverie.
“Tileworks,” I replied absently.
“Excellent.” He flashed me what had once been a rare grin but was slowly becoming much more common in these quiet moments between the two of us.
I worried at first that Leo might become bored with sourcing all the materials and making so many small decisions, but he never once complained or acted in a way that made me think he was annoyed with the process. While he typically defaulted to me on decisions, he spoke up if he felt strongly about something, and true to his word, money seemed to be of no object.
Throughout the first few weeks, outside those brief flashes of candor on our road trips, Leo remained aloof and reserved, but occasionally I would get glimpses of him lettinghis guard down, like when he’d reassure himself quietly, “Dad would like that,” or something similar, after picking a specific component.
I was sympathetic to his grief, as he was so deeply impacted by the loss of his father, and I wondered what he had been like before. Had he always been so solemn and solitary? I was desperate to know more, and I did sense the very early seeds of a potential friendship blooming between the two of us.
Did he feel the same?
Could you be friends with someone who never shared a single thing about themself with you?
Could I be satisfied with such a mysterious acquaintance?
The answer to all of the above wasprobably not.
I was beginning to enjoy the routine Leo and I had started to settle into. He’d have a fresh, hot cup of coffee waiting for me every morning at eight a.m. on the dot. We’d review our plan for the day over said coffee, and get to work.
At first I brought lunch with me, but after a couple of days, Leo started ordering in for us, which was a nice treat and one less thing for me to worry about, considering how the long commute and continued distance from Adam was weighing on me.
Leo’s small, kind gestures further exacerbated the conflicting feelings escalating inside of me over my relationship with Adam. Leo was my boss, and that was a lineI couldn’t cross…a line I shouldn’t even be thinking about in the first place.
But being appreciated and considered by someone made me realize maybe I didn’t want things to work out with Adam. I didn’t think he was capable of treating me how I wanted to be treated.
The thought of ending things made my stomach knot up. Confrontation had never been a strength of mine, and Adam always had a way of twisting what I was saying and thinking to make me feel he was in the right.
“Dare I ask how things are going with Adam?” Mina asked delicately over coffee one weekend.
“I don’t know…” I hedged.
“Penny.” Mina’s tone took on a warning note.
“He’s been working closely with a new architect at the firm, lots of late nights on the project.” I sighed. “I’ve just been a little lonely, is all.”
“Newfemalearchitect?” she asked hesitantly.
“Yeah…”
I had never been the jealous type before meeting Adam two years ago, since I had known going in that he was a flirt. It was just the kind of guy he was. In the beginning, things were so intense that it took a while for me to realize that kind of behavior, no matter how innocent, made me feel insecure.
It was quite the whirlwind romance after he’d started at the firm. We’d moved in together quickly, and he’d swiftly risen up the ranks at my parents’ architecture firm.
Any time I mentioned my discomfort with him being overly friendly with the female staff, he’d explain the situation, which always sounded so much more reasonable when it came from him, and then I’d be left feeling silly for being jealous, wondering if it was all in my head.
Our relationship as of late had become a bit more tenuous. I’d get upset over feeling neglected, and he’d be mad that I hadn’t given him the benefit of the doubt. It was a never-ending, vicious cycle that I hadn’t found a way to exit. I’d never struggled in a relationship the way I did with Adam.
Before I’d met Leo and realized the disparity in how Adam treated me compared to the way Leo did, there had been moments of love and clarity that I’d clung to, that had made me want to fight to be with him. Those moments seemed to pale in comparison to the possibilities I saw on the horizon, in a future without Adam.
Between my recent realizations and Mina’s validation, I was left spiraling, wondering if all this time and effort spent trying to make things work was even worth it.
I already knew the answer. The question was if I was ready to do anything about it.
