Page 40 of Rush

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"Some drunk guy harassed me. Rush stepped in."

"And?"

"And Rush almost didn't stop."

The old ladies exchange looks and I know they understand what I'm not saying.

"How are you doing with that?" Ailbhe asks carefully.

"I'm fine. He stopped when I asked him to."

"And Rush?"

"Not fine. He thinks he's a monster."

Gráinne sighs. "Of course he does."

"What does that mean?"

"Rush has been carrying shit around for years. He's convinced he's dangerous."

"He is dangerous."

"So is your dad. Doesn't make him a monster."

She's right and I know it. Danger and monster aren't the same thing.

But Rush can't seem to tell the difference.

"I need to talk to him," I say.

"Good luck with that."

I finish my wine and stand up, then I walk over to the bar.

Rush sees me coming, and I watch him decide whether to stay or run. He stays, but barely.

"Can we talk?" I ask.

"Not a good idea."

"I wasn't asking if it was a good idea. I was asking if we can talk."

Tank and Bozo exchange looks, then they leave without a word.

Rush watches them go. "You just cleared the bar."

"Good. I don't want an audience."

"Everly—"

"Outside, now."

I walk toward the door, and after a second I hear him follow, his footsteps heavy behind me.

We get outside into the cold night air and I turn to face him.

"What are we doing?" I ask.

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