Page 8 of The Long Way Home
And who knows. Maybe Rachel and I would have found our own version of a happy ending if I hadn’t ruined it first. Thatthought used to haunt me. But I’ve never been the kind of man a woman like Rachel deserves. I’ve always carried things with me that don’t leave, shadows I can’t shake. There are things I can’t offer her. Stability. Safety. The kind of love she is worth.
I don’t know if I ever could.
I clear my throat. “I’m gonna get another drink. Anyone need one?” I ask, glancing around the table while forcing casualness into my voice.
“Nope, I’m good,” Kelly says, barely looking up from her plate.
“Same,” Lucas adds, tapping his bottle lightly.
The band starts into another slow one. A familiar chord that invites muscle memory more than real intention. Couples drift to the dance floor. Some go out there with practiced ease, others still figuring out where to place their hands.
I stand near the bar just off the edge of the floor. My glass is nearly empty, the last of the whiskey warming my chest.
I watch Rachel out there, in the middle of the dance floor.
Her arms are looped around Ben’s neck. His hands hang loosely at her waist, barely touching her, like even this level of closeness is more than he can manage. She’s staring past him, and I think she’s somewhere else entirely.
Ben leans down and says something in her ear. I watch her brows pull together. She blinks, then barely nods. And then he lets go. I watch his hands drop from her waist. He glances at his phone. In one sweep he lifts it to his ear and walks off the floor toward the patio without another word.
Un-fucking-believable.
I start to move, but before I get too far, I stop myself. I can’t let my old instincts kick in. She isn’t mine to save. It is better for both of us if I stay here, where it is safe. It is easier this way.
Rachel stays there, in the middle of the floor. Her shoulders don’t move at all, not even when the song shifts. I expected herto walk back to her seat, but instead, it is like she is frozen there. Why isn’t she leaving?
Then I see her expression shift into something I refuse to watch.
“Fuck doing what is good for me.” I shoot back the rest of my drink and set my glass down on the bar. I push through the couples, eyes fixed on her. She doesn’t deserve to feel this. She shouldn’t have to feel abandoned by him, too.
When I stop in front of her, she looks up, eyes narrowing as they sweep over me.
I hold out my hand. “Looks like you saved me that dance.”
Her gaze drops to my hand. I see the flicker in her throat when she swallows. She shifts her weight, balancing on the balls of her feet, measuring me.
“You’ve really got some nerve,” she says, tone clipped.
“I do,” I say, keeping my eyes locked on hers. “But you always knew that.” Her hand hovers, trembling slightly before sliding into mine.
The moment her hand hits mine, I pull her in immediately, pressing her against me. My hand settles at her waist, fingers splayed across the small of her back. With her this close to me, I remember exactly why touching her was terrible idea.
I know I’m being reckless. I know I shouldn’t be this close to her, not when I know nothing between us has changed. Every rational part of my mind is screaming to step back, to keep my hands to myself, to let her have this moment without me in it. She should be free to be sad or lonely. She has every right to feel whatever she needs to feel on that dance floor without me complicating it. But I’m a weak man.
“You’re tense, Sunny. Try and relax.”
“I’m not tense.” She jerks her hand slightly from mine.
“You always were a terrible liar.”
“I haven’t seen you in four years. You’re practically a stranger, Rhett. Sorry if I’m a little out of my comfort zone.” Her words slice through the air, and she straightens her back.
I can’t stop the grin that spreads across my face. She is still quick with that mouth.
“Is something funny to you?” she questions.
“No,” I say, teasing. “You’re just reminding me of Josh. You both pout the same way.”
I twirl around with her in my arms before she can respond, and I swear I see the corner of her mouth pull.
