Page 16 of When She Was a Governess
Chapter Four
Henry sat athis desk in the study, the afternoon light filtering through the rain-streaked windows. His hand still tingled from where it had touched hers, and he could still see the look in her eyes when she’d accepted—relief and resignation mingled together in a way that made his chest ache.
She’d said yes. She would stay. Amelia would have the mother she needed. And he would have a wife who married him for a child.
Henry shook his head, dismissing the thought. This was what he’d proposed. A practical arrangement. He had no right to wish for anything more, and no reason to think Sophia harbored any feelings beyond her devotion to Amelia. He was offering her safety and security, nothing more.
He had loved Eleanor with a passion that had burned bright and hot. When he’d lost her, a part of him had died with her. Eleanor had been the only woman for him, then and now. A marriage of convenience would suit him fine.
He pulled out a fresh sheet of paper and dipped his pen in the inkwell. First, Sebastian Ashford. The man deserved to know immediately that his sister’s circumstances had changed so dramatically.
The letter came easier than he’d expected, the words flowing as he explained the situation, his proposal, and Sophia’s acceptance.
Montrose Manor, Kent
24thFebruary 1819
Your Grace,
I write to you on a matter that concerns your sister, Miss Sophia Ashford, and I confess I do so with both urgency and considerable emotion.
This morning, I asked Miss Ashford to be my wife, and to my great joy and relief, she has accepted me.
I am aware this will come as a surprise. When Miss Ashford entered my household two years ago to serve as governess to my niece, I was barely acquainted with her beyond the regular reports of Amelia’s progress. Our paths crossed infrequently, and I am ashamed to admit I maintained a distance from the nursery until Miss Ashford encouraged me to spend more time with Amelia.
What began as a desire to learn from your sister how to be a better guardian to my niece became something I had not anticipated. I have come to admire her remarkable strength, her generous heart, and her quick mind. She has endured more than most could bear and emerged with a capacity for love that humbles me.
I will be candid with you. My circumstances are not uncomplicated. My late uncle’s will requires that I marry before I turn thirty, a deadline I face in six months’ time.
I cannot promise I am the match you envisioned for your sister when you determined to give her a Season. I can only promise that I will honor her, protect her, and do everything in my power to make her happy. She will want for nothing, and she will be cherished.
Given the constraints of time and my desire to spare your sister any interference from my parents, I hope to marry within the week. I would be deeply honored if youand Lady Ashford would attend the ceremony, as I would your brother Lord James and his wife. Sophia should be surrounded by those who love her when she takes this step.
I await your reply, and I hope for your blessing.
Montrose
How easily the lies had flowed from his pen to paper. While writing, he’d almost believed he truly loved Miss Ashford. If he were not committed to Eleanor’s memory, he could easily understand how a man could fall in love with the governess. She was breathtakingly beautiful, kind-hearted, sensitive, and passionately devoted to family. If only he were not so damaged, perhaps he would have the fortitude to make sure she fell in love with him. If that was even possible. She certainly did not appear to have any feelings about him whatsoever. He was merely Amelia’s guardian. Which was fine with him. Still, lying made him uncomfortable.
He glanced at his sister’s portrait. “I’m doing this for Amelia. As you would want me to.”
Rebecca did not answer back. He closed his eyes, hoping to hear her voice in his head, but it did not come. He was on his own.
The second letter was harder.
Henry stared at the blank page for a long moment, then began to write. His parents needed to know, but they didn’t need to know in time to interfere. The letter was brief, formal, and deliberately devoid of any invitation for commentary or objection.
Montrose Manor, Kent
3rdMarch 1819
Father, Mother,
I write to inform you that I was married this morning to Miss Sophia Ashford, sister to His Grace the Duke of Ashford, in the church at Whitmore-by-Sea. The ceremony was attended by her family and Charlotte and Thomas.
Miss Ashford has served as governess to Amelia for the past two years. During that time, she has proven herself to be a woman of exceptional character and devotion. I have come to hold her in the highest regard, and I am pleased to say that my affection is returned.
As you are aware, Uncle George’s will required that I marry before my thirtieth year. This condition has now been met with a bride I am proud to call my wife. Additionally, the question of Amelia’s guardianship, which you raised in your recent correspondence, is now resolved. Lady Montrose and I are fully capable of providing Amelia with the stable household you deemed necessary.
