Page 15 of When She Was a Governess
“How do we explain it to Amelia?” Sophia asked.
“You would know better than I, but isn’t she too young to understand?”
“Yes, she is. Yet she is accustomed to me being right next door. I am unsure how to explain it to her.”
“We’ll do it together. I will tell her that Uncle Henry is marrying Miss Sophia and we will be a family.”
A family. In name only.
Sophia drew in a shaking breath. She already knew her answer. She was going to do this. She had no other choice but to choose Amelia.
“Then yes, my lord. I’ll marry you.”
Lord Montrose’s eyes closed briefly, and when he opened them again, she glimpsed something raw and vulnerable before he stood abruptly, putting distance between them.
“Thank you, Miss Ashford. You have my profound gratitude. I’ll speak with the vicar this afternoon to make the arrangements. I’ll write to your brother immediately.”
“I confess, I do not know if he will give his blessing,” Sophia said.
“I am a good match for you. I have a title and money. It is the answer we have all been looking for. Surely he will see that?”
“Sebastian wants only the best for me. Yes, I believe he will see this as a wonderful opportunity for me. There is onlyone thing. Both Sebastian and James married for love, not convenience. I worry they want the same for me. In fact, I know they do.”
He stared at her for a moment. “Are you suggesting we pretend to be in love?”
“I was not.” Yet it might be an excellent plan. “But now that you say it, perhaps it is what weshoulddo. It will ensure my brother’s blessing.”
“I have never pretended to be anything but myself, much to my mother’s disappointment. Thus a lie of this proportion is quite an undertaking. One I would not take lightly. We must get to know each other as best we can before your brother and his wife come to the wedding. Otherwise, he will know, will he not?”
She nodded. “Yes, you’re correct. We must appear to be in love. And no, we do not know each other.”
“We have a short time to do so. May I suggest you dine with me this evening? We will talk. Share details of our pasts.”
“Yes, my lord. When you write to my brother, simply tell him we’ve fallen in love while spending time with Amelia. He will believe it to be true.”
“Why do you say so?”
“My brothers have a rather high opinion of their little sister. They will be certain you could not resist my beauty or charm.” Sophia smiled.
A flash of an emotion she had not yet seen in the lord’s eyes startled her for a moment. If she were to guess, she would say it was guilt. What was it he was thinking?
Sophia rose on unsteady legs. “I should return to Amelia.”
They stood awkwardly, neither moving toward the door. Finally, Lord Montrose crossed the space between them and took her hand. His touch was warm, his fingers steady where hers trembled. He raised her hand to his lips and pressed a kiss to her knuckles. “I shall see you this evening.”
“Thank you, yes.” She withdrew her hand gently and walked to the door, her legs somehow carrying her despite the way the floor seemed to tilt beneath her feet. In the doorway, she paused and looked back.
Lord Montrose stood before Rebecca’s portrait, one hand braced against the mantel, his head bowed. The gray light from the windows cast him in shadow, and he looked suddenly sad and alone in a way she understood. Only too well.
Then Sophia stepped into the corridor and closed the door softly behind her, leaving him to his ghosts.
She’d just agreed to marry a man who didn’t love her, who would never love her, who had offered her safety and security and nothing of himself.
And she’d said yes.
For Amelia, she told herself as she climbed the stairs back to the nursery.
She was doing this for Amelia.
