Page 18 of I'm Gonna Get You Back
Maybe he doesn’t hate me. Maybe if I had areasonto be around this weekend, he’d even talk to me.
My resolve starts to crack.
If I make the video for West, I’ll be doing something that will help the school and this program. Something I vowed to never go near again. Not after the way the school treated me. The way theWeststreated me.
But it’s also a way back in with Reid. I can edit a “hype” video in my sleep at the end of the weekend, but in the meantime, I can see how he’s doing. Apologize.
Try to repair what I broke.
In truth, my decision has nothing to do with Legacy and everything to do with Reid.
I guess I’m going to a party.
CHAPTER SIXCLARATHEN
“THIS IS THE FIRSTnight I’ve been out in, like, months,” Delaney said. It was a warm evening in early October, but she was wearing a baggy sweatshirt and only her manicured fingertips poked out of the sleeves as she drove to Kenji’s house.
“I seriously need to unleash tonight. This Legacy shit is kicking my ass,” Amaya said, checking her lip gloss and smoothing her already immaculately straight black hair in the visor mirror.
I nodded along with everyone else.
Between school, homework, cross-country, filming, and work, I wasalwaysbusy. And it wasn’t just me. Nicole had tacked on extra runs to her training schedule, Amaya had been cast as the lead in the fall play, and it seemed like no matter when I texted Delaney, she was at the dance studio. Though Legacies wouldn’t be chosen for months once we submitted our official applications, they made it very clear all our behavior and extracurriculars mattered. No rule breaking, no missteps.
How were we supposed to sustain this?
My phone buzzed with a text from my dad—his response to my question fromlastweek asking if he was going to come back for Legacy Weekend.
Dad:Not going to make it. Briana doesn’t think it’s a good idea. Tell your mom for me?
I read it three times looking for the apology or acknowledgment that he hadn’t reached out once since he left that summer.
Of course, there was none. Because the opinion of the woman who he broke Mom’s heart for was apparently more important than his relationship with his daughter. I was no better than Mom in hoping that the lure of his former glory days might be reason enough to bring him home even if I wasn’t.
“Awwww,” Amaya sighed. “Josh just texted telling me to hurry up and get to the party. He was so distant when I was in New York this summer, but ever since I’ve been home he’s been, like, so in love with me.”
Guilt and shame roiled through me all over again about what happened with Josh. I guess I was no better than Dad, either.
As we made our way up the side of the mountain where Kenji lived, Amaya went on and on about what an amazing boyfriend Josh was.
Nicole rolled her eyes and finally cut her off by saying, “I hope Reid’s coming tonight.” Her voice was almost pained as she said it.
Amaya’s laugh carried from the front seat. “You’re so obsessed.”
Delaney shot me a look in the rearview that I pretended not to see since I wasobviouslybusy studying the fascinating buttons on my camera.
“Have you and Reid been talking?” Delaney asked Nicole.
I suppressed a smile at her protective tone.
Nicole bit her lip and nodded. “Well, sort of. We’ve been running together. He pushed me at practice yesterday, but in a way that made mewantto go as hard as possible. He’s intense, but”—she paused, searching for the right word—“sweet,” she concluded.
Exactly, I thought. But I wasn’t about to say that out loud. Though Delaney had squashed the rumor about the party in its tracks, and Josh and Amaya were back together again, stories about the “mystery girl” had spread through the school like an oil spill.
Ridiculous lies that he and the mystery girl had sex, that there was more than one mystery girl in the room, that there was more than oneguyin the room. I sometimes wondered if Josh was the person behind it, spreading rumors about himself for some sort of locker room clout.
Delaney and Kenji told me they’d heard my name come up once or twice after that practice, but Amaya didn’t believe any of it. It seemed I was in the clear. But my brush with calamity was enough to keep my mouth shut and my mind focused the rest of Legacy year.
We arrived at Kenji’s and piled into his house, where music boomed and people were already yelling and laughing. The three of them beelined for the kitchen to get drinks, but after that summer party, I’d steered clear of alcohol. No more messy mistakes. I hid behind my camera as I wandered around.
