Page 21 of Sweet Surrender
“Rowyn said she’d bring us to the library and then the woods on an adventure, and then we’re going to paint our nails and do art. We haveplans, Mom. You can’t just change my plans.”
Amelia’s voice rose a couple of octaves, and Eliza’s patience wore thin.
“Amelia, lower your voice. I do not appreciate the way you’re speaking to me right now. If you want me to listen to you, speak in a respectful way that’s going to get you heard.”
Amelia threw herself back against the beanbag that they were huddled on for story time and clenched her fists in obvious frustration.
“What’s the point? You won’t listen anyway. You don’t listen to anyone because you always think you’re right. Just go to work like you always do and let us have fun.”
Eliza recoiled as if she had been slapped. That’s how it felt to hear your child speak your insecurities out loud.
“Mila, you don’t mean that. You’re being mean. We can do that stuff and have fun with Momandwith Rowyn.”
Eliza hated that Elliot was trying to play peacekeeper between them, but words stuck in her throat. If a client hadspoken to her so disrespectfully, she would have no problem standing up for herself. But her daughter, who looked so much like Eliza herself, was a mirror image of her inner critic who had come to vocalize her fears for all to hear.
“But Mom said she was sending Rowyn away for the day. That’s not fair.”
Eliza ignored the words that Amelia hopefully said only in anger and focused on the facts of the situation instead.
“It’s not that I’m sending Rowyn away, Amelia. This is Rowyn’s job. You know she has every Sunday off anyway, like she won’t work when you’re at your dad’s next week too. So, I’m giving her an extra day off tomorrow, that’s all.”
Elliot looked at Amelia’s scowling face and then back to Eliza, who was clearly failing miserably at fixing the situation and keeping bedtime on track.
“I bet Rowyn wouldn’t want the day off, though. Can we ask her? She’ll want to spend time with us, she enjoys it,” Elliot said hopefully.
Logically, Eliza was aware of her own projection. But her brain couldn’t help finishing Elliot’s sentence silently.
She enjoys it, unlike you.
“It’s not fair to put Rowyn on the spot like that, Elliot. Plus, I wanted some family time.”
“I thought it’s supposed to be for all of us, not just whatyouwant. Plus, Rowyn is family. She lives here, doesn’t she?” Amelia said with a glare.
She was in fight mode tonight, and Eliza had no idea why. She hadn’t had time to debrief with Rowyn on how the day had gone to find out if something had happened to put Amelia on edge. Focus on the facts, Eliza reminded herself.
“Yes, she lives here. But you know where people live doesn’t always determine who their family is.”
It had been a hot topic when Eliza and Henry divorced,about how families come in all shapes and sizes, and not living together all of the time didn’t make them any less of one. It probably wasn’t the point Eliza should be focused on, but it was the only thing she could think to say without losing her cool.
“We made a plan,” Amelia said more quietly.
The fight was seeping out of her, but the dejection on her face gutted Eliza even more than the anger.
“How about we talk about it in the morning, okay? Let’s do our story and we can figure it out after a good night’s sleep.”
The desperate hope in Eliza’s voice made her feel weak, and she chastised herself for it.
“I don’t want a story,” Amelia said as she jumped up from the beanbag and stormed to her room. “I’m going to sleep. But it won’t be good.”
Amelia aimed her parting words with as much venom as she could muster at Eliza. She threw herself dramatically beneath the covers and turned to face the wall.
“We can do the story in my room,” Elliot said as he got up too.
Their rooms sat one room apart, with the playroom between them, where they did story time. The bean bags were situated with an unobstructed view of both of their beds when their doors were open. It was a spot Eliza had occupied on more than one occasion when they were having restless nights.
“Actually, Mom, can we skip the story tonight? I’m kinda tired too. We can do two tomorrow night.”
That was something Eliza had said to the kids on more occasions than she cared to admit when she hadn’t made it back for story time. Hearing the words spoken back to her made her feel even worse about saying them.
