Page 15 of Sweet Surrender
“Mom, Mom, look I did it!”
Eliza opened her mouth to chastise Elliot for intruding on their conversation, but bit back her words at the excitement on his face. She took a deep breath and turned away from a still silent Rowyn to face the kids.
“What did you do, kiddo?”
Elliot pointed toward the sticks lined up beside them and back to the books on the blanket. Books Eliza hadn’t seen until this moment.
“I was gettin’ so mad about the numbers again like always. Rowyn said she had a trick. She showed me if I get stuff like the sticks and line ’em up, I can see what the numbers look like. I gotallmy maths done so quick, and I didn’t even yell or cry!”
Eliza walked toward her son and knelt down to look at the book. Elliot had struggled with maths for as long as he’d been learning it, and no amount of tutoring helped it stick. They’d make some progress and then the equations would change, and it would be like they were back to square one. It had gotten to a point where if Elliot completed even half of the questions on his maths homework, they considered it a win. Eliza looked at the page where he had in fact completed every single one of the sums, and it looked as if at least three-quarters of them were correct.
Eliza looked up to where Elliot was beaming with pride, and her heart melted. Until she turned her gaze toward Rowyn, and it sank to the soles of her feet.
“I decided to kill two birds with one stone and bring their homework outside. I struggled a lot with maths too as a kid, and seeing the problems visually laid out with everyday items helped. I thought we would give it a shot. Amelia has been working on her art project which required using nature to create something on a canvas.”
Rowyn’s usual bright and cheery voice was quiet and subdued. Eliza was the one who caused that, and she hated herself for it.
“That’s great,” Eliza said.
She directed her words to Elliot as she stood back up.
“I need to talk to Rowyn for a minute, but you keep going with the rest and see what else you can use out here.”
Eliza gathered herself before she turned toward Rowyn.
“Rowyn, I’d like to—”
“It’s fine. I should help them get finished so we have sometime to play before dinner.”
Rowyn turned away and looked at the homework sheet intently. Eliza searched her face for a moment before nodding. She would address this later when the kids’ ears weren’t perking up with interest. After she had time to sort through her reaction and maybe understand Rowyn’s a little more too. Eliza had been harsh in her initial admonishment, but Rowyn’s response was out of character for the confident woman Eliza had come to know in the days they had spent together.
Eliza’s phone was ringing when she stepped back into her office, and she picked it up with a groan.
“I’m an ass,” Eliza said as Lee snorted from the other end of the line.
“True, but why this time?” Lee asked.
Eliza resigned herself to an unproductive rest of the day as she sank back into her chair and regaled Lee with her dramatic afternoon.
“Hmm,” Lee said after Eliza finished the retelling.
“Hmm? That’s all you have to say?”
“I’m not sure how to say this nicely, but…why do you care? You never have before.”
Eliza scoffed while she glared at the phone, as if Lee could see the action.
“Why do I care about hurting someone’s feelings? I’m not a monster, Lee.”
“No, you’re not a monster. But, and don’t take this the wrong way, it usually takes more time than this for you to remember your words can hurt a stranger’s feelings. I mean, how many times have you told me that if your opinion is the thing to make a stranger question themselves, then maybe theyshouldbe questioning themselves? You don’t give a toss what someone thinks of you if they aren’t people whose opinions you’ve grown to value, and you believe everyone else should feel the sameway. Usually, her reaction would make you questionher, not yourself.”
Eliza opened and closed her mouth, but she couldn’t form an appropriate response. Nothing Lee said was untrue. Eliza did feel that if you let words from someone whose opinion meant little to you impact your day, that was a you problem.
“She’s not a stranger,” Eliza said.
It was the only thing she could think to argue with from Lee’s statement.
“You know what I meant. Stranger, acquaintance, staff member who isn’t in your inner circle. Whatever you want to call it. Listen, all I’m saying is I’ve seen you tear some of your nannies to shreds and not blink an eye, and that’s after months of them working for you. Rowyn has been here for what…a few days? What’s different?”
