Page 2 of Soft On Her
“Period. My pops ain’t never played about me,” I grinned at the memories.
I was the only girl amongst two boy cousins. Everything they wanted to do, I wanted to do it too. Riding dirt bikes, climbing trees, shooting Nerf guns, and even playing tackle football. Since I was always rough as hell and played tackle football with the boys, my family had assumptions about my sexuality from a young age. They always made sure that I knew I was loved regardless, and my father would disappear anybody who had anything negative to say about my boyish ways growing up.
Most of my family thought I would grow up to be a stud, or masculine presenting, but that wasn’t the case at all. I loved acute dress and a sexy pair of heels. You might catch me in a pair of basketball shorts and a tank top if I’m lounging around the house, but that was about it.
Little league football was how my cousin Terrel met his best friend, Mikel, who eventually introduced me to his cousin, the love of my life, Milani. They were both offspring of the Harris family, which ranked fourth among the four families. We attended the same schools and events, and naturally became close, since there were only three of us in our age range.
Since the first day we met, I understood what it felt like to have a crush on someone. I knew the feeling was mutual. It was all in the way she’d light up when we saw each other; it wasn’t the type of light that you had when you saw a platonic friend. She’d blush and stare into my eyes with adoration. Our brewing feelings for each other was the worst kept secret. We went to prom together in coordinating dresses, and were practically joined at the hip, but neither of us had ever voiced our feelings. I think we were both terrified to cross that line and risk losing the friendship we shared.
“Where are y’all two missing counterparts, Mikel and Milaniiiiii?” Aunt Bunny questioned, putting a long emphasis on her name. “Are they later than me? That’s not like them at all.”
“Mikel said he left his weed in the car, so he went to grab it a few minutes ago.”
“He fits right in with Levi and Terrel,” she rolled her eyes.
“Aunty Bunny. You can’t knock it until you try it. You’ve made it known you were too high and mighty to give it a try.”
“I don’t need to alter my brain to have a good time,” she waved me off. Now where is Milani?”
“I don’t know where Milani is,” I replied.
My mind wandered to Milani’s whereabouts quite a few times since Mikel showed up without her. Mikel said Milani didn’t answer the phone, and I texted her a few minutes ago, butstill hadn’t received a reply. Before I could voice my thoughts, Milani came strutting into the backyard with my mother leading the way. Her warm hazelnut skin tone set off the magenta monokini and sarong hugging her waist. I promise she was the most beautiful girl I ever laid eyes on, and my cheeks heated when she smiled at me. Milani’s hair was in extra small waist length knotless braids, looking every bit of vacation ready.
“Hey, Milani, I was just asking about you.” Aunt Bunny waved at her, then turned to hug me again. “You better stop playing and tell Milani how you feel before she goes away to college. Bill told your dad who told your mom, and then she told me that Milani kissed you on prom night,” she detailed, referring to my driver and personal security.
I gasped, because I thought that secret died in the truck on prom night. When we arrived at Milani’s house after prom, she leaned over and pecked my lips just as Bill opened the door. I sat frozen from the brief feeling of Milani’s lips pressed against mine as she dashed toward her front door. It felt like some runaway fairytale shit as Milani gathered her dress in both hands and ran toward her parents' house, her heels clacking against the pavement with every rushed step. Bill laughed and shook his head before closing my door. He stood guard until Milani was safely inside. I brought up the kiss when we met up at school the following Monday, but Milani dodged the subject, so I left it alone.
“Mhhhhh hmmmm,” she smirked.
“Hi, Aunty Bunny,” Milani waved back once she was a few feet away from us.
“That bathing suit is everything,” Aunt Bunny complimented Milani before embracing her in a hug. “I’m going inside to chill with ya mama and Aunt Violet,” she informed me.
“Bye, Aunt Bunny.” I shook my head.
“Sorry I’m late, but I came bearing gifts,” Milani bubbled once we were alone.
“What is it?” I questioned, accepting the long black David Yurman box.
“Open it and you’ll see,” she smirked.
“Wait, I have something for you too. Come on,” I informed Milani, grabbing her hand. “Where is Levi and Terrel? I need to smoke. I spent the morning arguing with my dad.”
“Oh no. Was it about you declining UF and paying the deposit for UC Davis?” I inquired, watching the frustration lines on her forehead disappear.
“We’ll talk about it tomorrow. I just want to enjoy the rest of the day. It’s your graduation party, I’m not trying to dampen the mood.”
“Are you sure?” I pried, squeezing her hand a little tighter.
“I’m good. I’ll be even better if you take me to my gift,” she sassed, her lips spreading into a smile.
I obliged, continuing across the grass. Unlike me, Milani didn’t have much autonomy over the next few years of her life. College was a requirement, and she was leaving to attend the University of Florida in August. That was a serious point of contention between Milani and her parents because that wasn’t the future she wanted. Milani’s dream was to attend UC Davis and become a veterinarian. However, their family was without a dedicated lawyer, and Milani was extremely intelligent, so they wanted her to play her part in the family.
Either way, my aunty was right, I had to step up to the plate and let Milani know my feelings before she left for either school in the fall. That was exactly what I intended to do before the day was over.
We maneuvered across the backyard and up the small set of steps before reaching the sliding glass door. The music wasblaring throughout the house, so I had to yell over it to garner my mother’s attention.
“Mom, where is the gift you wrapped for me?” I shouted once we were a few feet away from her and my aunts.
