Page 37 of Must Love Lavender and Little Lies
“You’d better, fiancé.”
At that, I laughed.
We made our way down the country road. It was a cool, spring night, but the air was perfumed with the scents of fresh leaves and new flowers. Finally, we reached Juniper’s cottage. Her garden was alive with light as fairies worked busily tending Juniper’s flowers.
I walked her to the door.
“Want to come in?” she asked. “I have tea and a respite if you need one.”
“I think you need that tea more than I.”
“I think you’re right.”
“I…I should probably get back,” I said, feeling the hesitation in my body and hearing it in my voice. As much as I was happy to see my family, I wanted to stay right where I was.
“Right. Okay,” she said, a tone in her voice I couldn’t quite read. “I have a lot to do tomorrow morning for the stuff swap and the seedling sale, anyway. I should get some sleep.”
“Okay.”
“All right.”
“Okay, good night, then,” I said, stepping closer to her.
“Good night,” she replied, setting her hand on my chest.
“Get a good rest,” I added, setting my hand on her lower back.
“Thank you. I will,” she said, tilting her head to look up at me.
“G-good night, Juniper,” I whispered, leaning in.
“Good night,” she whispered in reply, lifting her lips to meet mine.
How it happened, I had no idea, but suddenly Juniper and I found ourselves entangled with one another in a way that had nothing to do with performance, nothing to do with the lie we were telling, but had everything to do with some odd yearning that had been growing unheard in my heart. That yearning had me pulling her closer to me, getting lost in the feel of her body against mine, the smell of her hair, the warmth of her lips tinged with the flavor of bloomberry wine. A wave of want washed over me, and in that moment, I felt that yearning and heard its voice clearly.
I think I might… I might actually, really, love her.
This is not pretending.
I…I love her.
But Juniper… Juniper had drunk too much. Juniper was lying to save me because she loved me as a friend, nothing more. She had drunk too much, and I was taking advantage of the situation. This wasn’t love. It was…wine.
I pulled back.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered. “All this kissing and lying and kissing has my head all turned around and?—”
“Don’t apologize,” she replied, taking a deep shuddering breath. “I’m just as guilty. I should… I should go in.”
“I’m sorry, Juniper. I shouldn’t have?—”
“I kissed you, too, remember? It’s not like I pulled away. I kissed you, too. It’s been a taxing day. Let’s just give ourselves some grace and forget it. We’re both tired, tipsy, and confused.” She laughed. “I’m sorry. I’m going in. I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“See you tomorrow.”
Juniper unlocked her door and stepped inside. “Good night. For real this time,” she said with a laugh, then closed the door behind her.
I stood there a moment, collecting myself before turning back.
