Page 71 of The Recovery Coach
“Because he’s in love with you and lying to himself about it.”
A lump formed in Olivia’s throat, and the world around them faded to a pinprick of light while she worked to comprehend Valentine’s words.“You think,” she choked out, “Connor is in love with me.”
“I’m almost certain.”Valentine nodded.
“You’re delusional.”
“No.”
“You are.Connor is not in love with me.He has never been in love with me.Trust me.”She fell back in her seat and crossed her arms, her mood swinging from amused to cranky.
Valentine rubbed his jaw as he studied her.“How do you know?”
Olivia couldn’t answer.The memory of Connor’s rejection was seared so deeply into the fabric of her being that sharing it may as well have been baring her soul for Valentine to critique.She shook her head.
He sighed.“You know you’re in love with him, right?”
She was close to bursting into tears.Fucking Connor.Her crush should have faded away over time.And it had.When she had distance from him.Which didn’t work while she lived at his house.
She managed a nod and grabbed her glass of water, taking small sips.
“Listen,” Valentine said.“You guys could be obnoxiously happy together.But for that to happen, you’re both going to have to get a little uncomfortable with each other.”
As she considered his viewpoint, all her hopes and dreams for the future flew through her head.She wanted a happy marriage and children.She wanted a dog named after their favorite snack, and her kids’ friends being comfortable enough with her to call her mom.She wanted to throw cheesy birthday parties and plan elaborate Christmas surprises.For years she had forced herself to blur out the face of the man she wanted to do it all with.She told herself it could be anyone.But with one off-the-wall statement, Valentine brought him into perfect, high-definition focus.
She groaned and let her forehead fall onto the table.Refusing to meet Valentine’s eyes during her admission, Olivia picked at a snag in her tights.
“I told him I loved him once.”
“What did he say?”Valentine asked.
Olivia forced herself to look at him.“Ew.”
“Oh my God.Fucking asshole.”
She pressed her lips into a flat line.“To be fair, I think I caught him off guard.It was his draft day, and we were both emotional knowing that everything would be changing soon.I offered to move with him.I thought he’d be happy.We were both terrified of the distance.But I was wrong.He ghosted me for six months after that, and then when we reconciled, he proceeded to refer to me as his sister for the next eight years, and now we’re here.”
“That’s messed up.”
The waitress chose that moment to bring their food, and they ate in uncomfortable silence for a while.
Olivia had begun thinking he would let the topic go and they could enjoy a nice evening as friends when he said, “We can work with this.”
She sighed.Now that he knew her not-so-subtle secret, he would be like a dog with a bone.
“I won’t do anything to jeopardize our friendship.I already put myself out there for him, and he crushed me.Right now he’s all I have.”
“He’ll come to you.”
“If you have any ideas to magically make him fall in love with me, I’m all ears.But I want no part of any scheming.”
“Think of it as creative problem-solving.He already loves you; he only needs to realize it.You won’t have to do anything special.”
If what he suspected were true, the future she envisioned for herself might be within reach.She’d be stupid not to explore that possibility.Right?Valentine seemed so sure, but if he was wrong, she could lose everything.Again.“What makes you so sure he loves me?”
“He talks about you all the time.”
“He talks about you all the time, too.”
