Page 1 of Starving Butterfly
1
THE SWEET KISS OF DEATH
August 12th
“What the fuck happened?” Shaw’s voice cut through my mangled scream.
“He stabbed himself. Must have swiped the blade when I wasn’t looking.” Karter replied.
“Listen here you prick, you better hope to hell that you can save him or so help me I will kill you and anyone you’ve ever held dear.” Shaw grabbed the collar of the doctor’s shirt as he spat the words.
“I’ll do what I can to stop the bleeding but if I don’t get him to a hospital soon he’ll bleed out.” He replied.
“No hospitals.” Shaw muttered.
“Fine I have a place we could use. It’s not far.”
Karter shone a flashlight in my eyes as something cold hit my balls. A scream reverberated through my lungs before everything went black.
There’sthis weird sense of being alive but also not being coherent enough for thoughts, and that was about how I felt. I was vaguely aware of the man talking over me as he cradled me to his chest. I hadn’t the slightest idea where we were headed, but he smelled good. I held onto that thought as the pain ripped through my body.Summer… I am sorry.I didn’t mean to be the source of your harm.
My life was notmy own. I knew it when I didn’t disappear into oblivion. When I woke up to the doctor checking my pulse and muttering about weak intervals. The cold, dark room only spiraled my thoughts as I clung to the sickness that leeched from my body.
“Stop trying to kill yourself. You failed. Three attempts and you’ve struck out. I have better things to attend to then a little boy having a meltdown.”
“Let me die and we won’t have a problem.”
“No.” He’s voice was firm, as he prepared a needle with what I could only imagine was some drug to knock me out. “Consider it an early wedding gift.”
“You’re demented if you think I am marrying that bitch.” I spat bitterly at the man.
His hand closed around my neck within seconds. Fear caught in my throat like the air he’d stopped. I stared defiantly into his cold, steel eyes. Karter came inches away from my face, looking at me with some emotion I couldn’t place. There was barely an inch between his lips and mine. Part of me wanted to close the distance, to taste something I never thought possible.
He slapped my cheek softly and smirked, withdrawing from my space.
“I don’t particularly enjoy the three hour plane rides here. I have better things to do with my time.” He flicked the syringe, clearing the bubbles from the bottom.
“Why give me the knife in the first place then?”
“Curiosity.”
“You have some serious problems.”
“No more than you. Go ahead hate me. I am a man doing a favor for a friend. You’d be wise to respect her.”
“Fuck you.”
“Soon you’ll realize the world doesn’t revolve around you. When you decide to wake up call me.” He shoved the syringe into my arm. Relief came sharp and ugly. As long as Karter kept pumping me full of drugs, I wasn’t useful. Drugs weren’t good for babies.
2
SUNSHINE NEVER LOOKED SO SWEET
August 13th
Inever understood how lonely I was until I was staring at the empty blackness in that smelly trunk. Isabella wasn’t really my mommy. Cole wasn’t really my daddy. The only person who cared enough was Reyna, and I couldn’t get the image of herbloodied body lying on the ground out of my mind. Every time the car bumped down the road, I’d scream and relive it all over again. Flashes of her blood splattered against the wall chart that measured how big we were as she lay crumpled, almost dead. She wasn’t dead, though. I knew she’d beat the odds. Reyna was the closet thing I had to a real mom. She couldn’t have died. I wouldn’t accept it.
Cole would say my mommy missed me every day, but if that were true, she would have been there for me. I hated Cole for not letting me see her. He was a big meanie head for keeping her away from us. I remember when Reyna snuck me photos of her once: this beautiful blonde woman with bright blue eyes and a yellow sundress. I cherished her even though I could never be with her. She was an angel.
