Page 60 of Wrecking Us
In all the years I’ve been with women, no woman has ever made me feel likethis.The anticipation is unlike anything I’ve ever known. I don’t know what he’s going to say. I don’t know what he’s going to do. But I do know whatever it is he wants, I’m going to do it. Because I do owe him an apology, but also because Iwantto.
This doesn’t have to mean anything.I tell myself this, like if I say it enough, I will believe it. I think about Hudson’s words the last time we did this.
You don’t have to be gay to have sex with a guy.
Which I’m not. I like women. I like fucking them—most of the time, even if it’s been less than stellar these last few years. That doesn’t mean I’m suddenly gay. Hell, Hudson is the only guy I’ve ever done this sort of thing with, so I’m pretty sure you can’t be gay for one person, and one hot-as-hell experience with dick doesn’t mean anything, right?
But… what about the second time? What’s the threshold? Is there a limit? Is there like a free trial period where you test the product before you subscribe to it?
I don’t know. But what I do know is that as Hudson thrusts himself against me, his kiss bordering on desperate, my dick strains hard against my pants and all I want to do is come. I don’t even care if I come in my fucking pants, as long as it’s whathewants. I’m so wound up, I feel like I’m going to explode into a million pieces. All I want is for him to tell me what to do and how to do it, so I can.
“Tell meexactlywhat you want, Hudson. I’ll do it.” The last part comes out softer than it should.
Hudson pauses, and I think this is where he tells me I’m an idiot and we can’t do this. But that’s not what he says. Not in the least.
“I want you to take your clothes off, and get on your knees,” he says without hesitation. “I want your hands on me at all times. That means you don’t touch yourself. Got it?” His words register, but I don’t really hear them. I mean, I do… but it’s not about thewords. It’s the way he says them. Like it’s acommandand not a direction. It’s hot as hell, I won’t lie.
“Okay,” I say breathlessly.
“Then I want you to put my dick in your mouth, and make me come.” He lets out a steady breath. “But you’re not allowed to. Do you understand?”
It takes me a moment to process what he’s saying, and when I do, I let out a slow breath.
“I’m not allowed to come, because that’s the punishment, right?”
Hudson’s gaze holds mine hostage and gives a simple shrug of one shoulder. “Right.”
“Then we’ll be good?” I ask, my voice low and pleading. “You won’t be mad at me anymore?”
Hudson nods, his hand on my bare, exposed skin warm and smooth.
I have never done anything like this before. Not even with a woman. I’m slightly worried I won’t be able to hold off, because I’m already so wound up. What happens if I can’t?
I’ve never been the kind of guy to back down from a challenge, and a part of me sees this as just that—a challenge.
I’ve made plenty of women come undone with my tongue. But can I makeHudsoncome the same way? Do Iwantto?
Yes.
I know it doesn’t make sense, and I should feel weird about this. It’s one thing totouchanother man’s dick, or let him touch yours, but it’s another thing altogether to put his dick in your mouth andswallowhis cum. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves—who’s to say I will be able to swallow it?
The idea is a bit unnerving, I won’t lie. But if I’m going to do this, I’m not going to half-ass it. So, I need to approach this the same way I would before a big meeting or a game.
I kiss him first, resting my hands on his chest. “Okay.”
Hudson’s body relaxes under my touch. I kiss him slowly, taking my time as my fingers work at unlatching his belt.
“Okay?” he asks, his voice soft and breathless. Almost as if he was expecting me to say no.
I nod as I kiss him, taking his bottom lip between my teeth.
“Don’t overthink it,” I tell him as I unbutton his khakis and slide my hands beneath the waistband of his underwear and push them down confidently. Though I’m not sure if I’m trying to convince him or myself. Maybe both.
I swallow hard, equal parts terrified and aroused by the idea of putting someone else’s dick in my mouth.No, not someone else. Hudson.
I lean in to kiss his neck as I find his dick with my hand. He shivers when I touch him, letting out a curse.
“Trey…”
