Page 53 of Convincing Carrie

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***

Things didn’t get better over the next few weeks. Christmas and New Year’s passed, and we were fast approaching the finalization of the divorce if everything continued to go smoothly. I’d continued to feel terrible, but it wasn’t anything I felt like I needed to go to the doctor for. I was often sick at my stomach, extremely tired, and sort of head-achey.

One morning I came out of my bathroom to find Blair waiting on me.

“Did you just get sick in there?”

“Yeah,” I said. I was getting used to the routine. Wake up, get sick, use mouthwash and brush my teeth, get on with my day. “I think it’s heartbreak disease. I looked it up online. It’s a thing, apparently. One lady said she lost fifty pounds when she was going through her divorce.”

“Here.” She was holding a bag from one of the local drugstores in her hand. She reached in, pulled out a box, and handed it to me. It was a pregnancy test.

I stared at it. “Oh. No, that’s not possible,” I said.

Blair gave me a look. “From what I knew about your marriage, your sex life was not a problem. Did that change towards the end?”

I sucked in a breath. “Somewhat. But even when we barely saw each other, we still made time for… that. But I was on birth control.”

Blair was calm. “Weren’t you on antibiotics for an ear infection recently? I remember because you powered through Orchid Ball preparations even though you were sick.”

Shit. I had been on a strong antibiotic for two weeks. “Oh my God. Antibiotics mess with birth control.”

Blair nodded, sympathy on her face, and put the box in my hand.

I stared at the pregnancy test with dread. Oh, God. I felt so dumb. Why hadn’t I thought of this?

“Blair,” I groaned, “life couldn’t be this cruel, could it? I’ve just about gotten the Caldwells out of my life for good. Please, please, please, tell me I’m not pregnant with his child right before the divorce is finalized!”

“There’s only one way to know. Go take it. I’ll be waiting.” She patted my back, then pushed me towards the bathroom gently.

I peed on the stick, which was not as easy as I’d assumed. I swear, if men were the ones who got pregnant, they would’ve thought of a test decades ago where you didn’t accidentally get urine on your hands.

I set it down face up, washed my hands, and sat on the side of the tub. I didn’t go out and talk to Blair. I was too anxious. When the timer went off on my phone, though, I couldn’t look. I bit my lip and poked my head out the bathroom door. “I can’t look.”

She came in, walked over, and looked down. “Oh, honey.” She looked up at me. “You’re pregnant.”

“No,” I whispered, collapsing on my bed. “No, no, no, no, no.” I’d always wanted children. But now? This felt like a cruel trick. I didnotwant to be pregnant by my soon to be ex-husband.

Blair stood helplessly watching me. “I don’t know what to say. A baby is something to celebrate. This is just really bad timing.”

“You think?” I stared at my ceiling. “Sorry. I don’t mean to take it out on you. I just… God. Those stupid Caldwells. They’ll be all over this.” I sat straight up, my hand over my mouth. “They’ll try to take my baby.”

Blair shook her head. “Thatcher might be a dick for what he did to you, but he wouldn’t try to take the baby.”

“I didn’t think he was the type to cheat, either, but here we are.” Ugh. “Do I have to tell him? What if we just go through with the divorce, I never see him again, and he never finds out he’s a dad?”

Blair looked massively uncomfortable. “I hate what he did to you, and he deserves to suffer. But I don’t think it’s okay to keep his child from him. Or the child from his or her father. Onceyou’ve had a chance to think things through, I bet you’ll feel the same way.”

“I know you’re right. Why do you always have to be right?” I threw a soft pillow at her. “I can’t believe this is happening.”

“I’ll give you the name of my OBGYN. She’s amazing. And you need to make an emergency appointment with your lawyer.”

I nodded. She was right. I couldn’t be unprepared for whatever Thatcher’s family might do once they knew I was pregnant with the heir to the Caldwell fortune.

I waited for Blair to leave to really think over my options. I could hide this baby from him. I could do it. If he sold the house and left Indigo Falls, there was a good chance he’d never come back. He’d never see me grow round with his child. Then I could be sure that the Caldwells were never again in my life.

I bit my lip. As much as I hated him for what he’d done to me, I couldn’t deny that Thatcher would be a great dad. Didn’t my child deserve that? To have two parents that loved him or her unconditionally?

And what about Thatcher? Yes, he’d turned out to be a horrible husband. But did that justify keeping his child from him?