Page 49 of Convincing Carrie
The mediator walked in. She looked familiar, but then everyone looked kind of familiar in Indigo Falls. It was a small town. She gave me a neutral sort of smile and sat down. She probably hated me. I was sure everyone in town did. I couldn’t say I blamed them, either. They’d all known Carrie since she was born. I was just the asshole who’d broken her heart.
I watched the minutes tick by as we waited on Carrie and her lawyer to show up. I knew she’d be here. She wasn’t the type to miss appointments. Of course, she wasn’t the type to be late to them, either, but she was.
“Gentlemen, if the other party hasn’t arrived in the next five minutes, we’ll have to delay mediation until…”
The door opened. “I’m so sorry,” Carrie walked in looking stressed. She smiled at the mediator. “Hey, Ms. Iris. Mom said you asked for this.” She handed her an index card with something written on it.
“Oh, her lemon bars. I’ve been asking her for the recipe for years! I can’t wait to make these.” She seemed to realize we were staring at her and cleared her throat. “I mean, please have a seat Ms. Crenshaw.”
“It’s still Caldwell,” I said, like an idiot.
Everyone turned and stared at me.
“Really?” my lawyer asked quietly. “That’show you wanted to start things off?”
“Sorry,” I murmured, trying to give Carrie a smile. She wouldn’t meet my eyes. I studied her. She didn’t look good. I mean, she looked beautiful because she was always beautiful, but she looked thin and there were dark circles under her eyes. She wasn’t getting good sleep. Her color was off, too, and I was concerned about her. This was all because I was a fool.
“Let’s get started. I’m Iris Johnson, and I’ll be your mediator going forward. I’ve looked over much of the paperwork, and it seems straightforward. Neither party is contesting the divorce, correct?”
“Not correct,” I said, loud enough to startle everyone. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to say it so loud. Carrie, I’ve been trying to contact you for weeks. I want to try and make our marriage work.”
Her eyebrows shot up and she looked completely skeptical. “Why?”
It was such a basic question, but it threw me. “Um… because I love you.”
“You have a strange way of showing it. Fucking his former fiancée isn’t exactly the biggest indicator a guy is into you.”
I went still. “You think…” I cleared my throat and started again. “You think I slept with her?”
“I know you did, asshole. Just in case those pictures I left you didn’t clear thinks up for you, Isawyou.”
“I didn’t fuck her! I stopped it before it could happen. That’s part of why I’ve been trying to talk to you! We could have clearedall this up.” I was so frustrated, my voice was coming out angry. I knew that wouldn’t help anything, but I couldn’t seem to calm my emotions down. “I didn’t fuck her!” I yelled it this time. “You must’ve walked in at the wrong moment.”
The mediator’s face was pale, and she reached for a glass of water. “Well, let’s remember to keep our language appropriate and our voices moderate.”
“Sorry, Ms. Iris,” Carrie said. She turned back to me. “I don’t want to work things out. I want a divorce, and then I’d like to never see you again.”
I flinched, feeling as if she’d slapped me. “It doesn’t matter that I didn’t…” my eyes darted to the mediator’s… sleep with her?”
Carrie leaned forward, angrier than I’d ever seen her. “Tell me this—did you take her up to the bedroom suite in your office with the intent to have sex with her?”
My face flushed. “I…”
“Just answer the question,” she bit out. “Yes or no?”
“Yes,” I admitted reluctantly.
“And you think because you stopped it from happening it erases everything else? The months of ignoring me, not telling me you had an ex-fiancée you were still in love with when you married me, humiliating me in front of a huge group of people at your mother’s birthday party, skipping the Orchid Ball, almost sleeping with her, and then telling her that you never would’ve married me if she’d been available?”
She ticked my transgressions off on her fingers.
I knew I’d gone pale. “No. No, I know it doesn’t erase any of the awful choices I made. It doesn’t erase how much I’ve hurt you.” I paused. “You heard me talking to her that night?”
She nodded.
“I found out later that she wasn’t who I thought she was. I know now that I was in love with you, Carrie!”
She scoffed and got a skeptical look on her face. “I doubt that very much. But it doesn’t matter anyway. You found out way too late for it to make any difference whatsoever to me.”
