Page 74 of The Drawn Arrow
Florian blinked, surprised. He had expected the news to upset him—with how adamant Kade had been for him to not use old magic—but his countenance now was one of weary resignation. The cold, numb feeling had started to creep up the back of Florian’s neck again, but the sensation of Kade taking hold of his hands snapped him out of it with a jolt.
“Can we go home now?” Kade asked. “Back to the Winter Court?”
Florian nodded, then looked back at the tree. The single handle on a knot on the trunk was still there. “Yeah. I need to ask her one last thing first, though.”
He looked back at Kade, and somehow the other man seemed to know that he needed to talk to her and only her. Kade nodded.
“I’ll start packing all this up, then,” he said slowly, and got to his feet.
Florian watched him for a moment before getting up as well. His legs quivered underneath him as he walked back to Elodie’s tree and placed his hand on the door knob. The door swung open for him easily, and he found Elodie sitting at her large plush chair again. The two chairs that he and Kade had been sitting on were gone, and she was reading a large book propped in her lap—she glanced up at him over the tome, and he realized that she was wearing half-moon reading glasses. He stifled a laugh: it was somehow endearing, despite the oddity of it all. She was rather eccentric, but he couldn’t think of her as a hag anymore, even if she did live in a swamp.
He closed the door behind him, and she set down her book.
“Leaving so soon?” she asked idly, and he nodded.
“I just wanted to ask you,” he said, and bit his lip. The thought had been gnawing at him since they’d returned, but it felt almost poisonous to speak aloud. “Do you... Do you maybe think that his soul being tethered to mine is what made me a Changeling? Could it have made me—made me trans?”
She tilted her head, and he looked away, feeling ashamed the moment the words left his mouth.
“Explain,” she said simply.
“It’s just,” Florian stammered, feeling her piercing gaze on him even though his eyes were locked on the ground. “He’s, you know, a man, and maybe if I hadn’t had his spirit connected to me somehow, I would have been... I would have been okay with being a girl.” His mouth twisted into a grimace. “Do you think that could be possible?”
“Hmm,” he heard Elodie hum under her breath—and then, to his surprise, she laughed. His head snapped up to look at her again. “Fae worry over the silliest things. To your first question, that this could have made you a Changeling—it’s entirely possible. Housing a second soul inside you, especially one so suffused with old magic, could certainly be the source of your Changeling nature. In fact, I would consider it quite likely. Changeling fae stopped appearing right around the same time the fae collectively decided to stop using old magic. There is almost certainly a connection there.”
Her gaze became more pointed now, searching him—he wanted to look away, but couldn’t bring himself to do it.
“As for your second concern,” she continued. “I don’t think so. But who can be sure? The true question is, why would it matter?”
“I mean...” Florian started, but there were no words to explain the roiling in his chest. “I don’t know. It feels like it would matter.”
“Who you are is your truth now,” she said, gesturing toward him with an outstretched hand. “The future is nebulous and may as well not exist. Your actions determine your future, and your past determines your present. This has been your reality for a long time. There are no longer any futures where you might have been content to remain female. All that exists is the present you made.”
Florian was silent for a long moment. Somehow her answer was not comforting, but the alternative would have been worse.
All he had wanted was answers. He hated that he had found none, only different questions.
“Thank you,” he said stiffly. Though her expression remained the same, he could tell she knew he was unsatisfied—he remained an open book to her, it seemed. A beat of silence passed as she observed him, and again he felt very much like a tiny animal being scrutinized by a bird of prey.
“I wish you only good fortune, King of the Winter Court,” she finally said, standing up as she spoke. “Despite my seclusion here, I do share your dream of seeing peace and abundance restored to the Veil once again. If there is ever anything I can do to help you, or if you simply want my advice once again, you will always be welcome here.”
Florian nodded. That seemed significant—he remembered even his father had needed an invitation to come here—but all he could focus on was the growing pit of frustration in his stomach.
“You are angry,” she said, in the casual tone she had used so often, as if it were an idle observation about the weather. It still stung to hear.
“Yes,” he sighed, rubbing a hand to the back of his neck. “None of this turned out the way I imagined. I guess nothing ever does.”
“Anger has its place,” she said, shrugging. “Only take care not to direct it where it doesn’t belong.”
“Right. Thanks,” Florian muttered, glancing away. But the irritation at her words left him as quickly as it came, and he forced himself to stay, despite how much he wanted to go. “Really, thank you. It didn’t go the way I thought, but it was still... important. I appreciate your help.”
“As I said, I will always be happy to help,” she said, and this time a slow smile spread across her face. Her mouth stretched unnaturally far, but he knew better than to be afraid of her now. “Until next time, then.”
“Yeah,” Florian nodded, turning to go. “Bye.”
She didn’t answer as he opened the door and stepped outside.
Kade was packing up their belongings away, and only a few panels of their shelter remained standing. When Florian glanced back at the tree, the door knob he had used was gone, and in its place stood a purplish mushroom. He let out a dry chuckle, shaking his head, then turned back to Kade.
“Need help?” he asked, and together they finished packing away the last of the tent.
When they were done, Florian glanced back at the tree one last time, but it didn’t look any different than before. He looked back at Kade; his face was stern and still. He felt tense, though he couldn’t quite place it.
“Ready?” he asked, holding out his hand. Kade nodded silently, but took his hand and squeezed it hard. There was tension in the air between them, but Kade was quiet, and his face didn’t betray any emotion.
Florian sighed, centering himself, and imagined them both back home, standing in the Moon Garden. This time he didn’t even try to speak the words aloud. He only exhaled the magic, and with a popping sensation, they returned to the Winter Court.
TO BE CONTINUED
