Page 117 of Cold Bastard
I ignored it.
Walking over to my desk, I powered up my computer and sat down, leaning back in my chair as I ripped open the yellow envelope. Inside was another sealed envelope. White. Plain. And written across the front in handwriting I hadn’t seen in over a decade was a single word:Tucker.
My breath caught as I stared at it, my hands suddenly unsteady as I flipped the envelope over.
Nothing. No return address. No explanation.
Just my name.
I ripped it open, my heart pounding too hard in my chest, and pulled out a single sheet of college-ruled lined paper. The handwriting was messy. Rushed. Like whoever wrote it had been in a hurry or didn’t have much time, but I recognized it immediately...Travis.
Hey, Little Brother,
I know it’s been a long time, and I’m sorry for that.
I guess if you’re reading this, I’m dead. Sucks, I know.
Look, I really don’t know what to say here, or if you’ll ever get this letter, but I want you to know something, Tucker. I never stopped thinking about you. Never stopped caring. When I left home, it wasn’t because of you. I just couldn’t stand by and watch Mom sink deeper into herself waiting for a man who was never coming back.
I know that ain’t gonna make up for the pain I caused, leaving you to deal with Mom and her string of fucked-up men, but it’s the truth. There were so many things I wish I could have done differently over the years, but walking away from that hell wasn’t one of them.
My regret was leaving you with her.
I’ve kept an eye on you over the years. Was real fucking proud when you up and joined the military. Saw you graduate,bro. You looked so sharp in your uniform. Thought you made it out, ya know, that you broke the cycle. Then I saw you at Sturgis a few years back, wearing a Bastards’ cut. I should have walked over to ya, should have hugged ya, hit ya—done something other than walk away. I’m sorry for that, too.
Shit, Tuck, I don’t know what to say right now, but with this biker war knocking on the door, I just wanted to tell ya, I’m sorry and to ask a favor from ya. I have an old lady, Mellie. She’s pregnant, Tuck, with my kid. If I don’t make it, would you please watch out for her? I know I don’t have any right to ask this, but I am.
Brother to brother.
For old time’s sake.
Travis.
I stared at the letter. The words blurred as my vision went hazy.Travis.My brother. The only family I had left in this world, and he was dead.
I read the letter again. And again. And again. Each time, the words hit harder.
I never stopped thinking about you.
I was real fucking proud when you joined the military.
I saw you at Sturgis.
He had been there. He saw me. And he walked away. Just like I walked away from Alex two days ago. My hands were shaking now, the paper crinkling under my grip.
I have an old lady, Mellie. She’s pregnant, Tuck, with my kid.
A kid.
Travis had a kid on the way and now that kid would never know their father.
If I don’t make it, would you please watch out for her?
I closed my eyes. The weight of the request settled over me like a lead blanket. He was asking me to take care of his old lady. His pregnant old lady. A woman I had never met. A responsibility I never asked for. But he was my brother, and now he was dead.
Brother to brother. For old time’s sake.
I let out a breath I didn’t know I’d been holding, my chest aching with something I couldn’t name.
