Page 10 of Delirium
The sheer ironyin the name of this place wasn’t lost on me, considering that it was where all the businessmen met with their flavors of the month. It also wasn’t lost on me that Indigo wanted to turn around and go back home when I told him that I was meeting Kieran. He soon relented when I explained that he was either going to drive me, or I was going to walk.
I guess that sitting at the nearby table, waiting for me to finish the conversation with Kieran, was a better option than telling Storm that he let me go alone.
“Is he going to kill me or is that how his face looks usually?” Kieran asked, stealing glances at Indigo whose eyes never left our table.
He was far away not to be able to hear us, but close enough to be able to jump in should it be necessary. I still thought it was unnecessary, but I wasn’t going to argue with him over this. You win some, you lose some, that was how it goes. If it made him feel better sitting over there, so be it.
“No, he always looks like that.” I chuckled.
“What?” Kieran looked at me. “Constipated?”
Laughter tore out of my chest, my head dropping down on the table with my forehead pressed against the wooden surface.
“Constipated,” I choked. “I can’t.”
“Well, he kinda does, doesn’t he?”
I straightened up, wiping the tears flowing down my face. “He definitely does,” I agreed.
The easygoing conversation we had suddenly died down, and I really looked at him. He used to be my friend, my fiancé, my everything, until he became a monster I wanted to eliminate. Yet here we were, sitting here like two long-lost friends, laughing over things that didn’t even matter.
I missed him.
I missed talking to him, laughing with both him and Cillian, and not in a romantic my-heart-still-beats-for-you way, but more because lately, I’d been feeling lonelier than before. The realization slammed into me out of nowhere, that if I died tomorrow, there would be only a handful of people who would mourn me.
That wasn’t the worst part. It wasn’t that I needed thousands and thousands of people to remember me, but I wanted to create my own little circle. I had Zoe, and I had Atlas, but I would never take them away from the Club. And while the Club might be the extended family of my kids, they weren’t mine.
I had to get in touch with Lazar, because he also needed to know what was going on. If the Belladonna situation wasn’t resolved by the time the kids came, I might need to think about other options.
“I called you to apologize, Birdy,” Kieran said, sipping his drink. “My behavior wasn’t exactly what you needed during those moments, and this chasm between us is killing me. I also came to apologize for everything else I ever did.”
He really went there.
“I know it is too late, and this isn’t me trying to win you back. We would never happen, and frankly, I think it’s for the best.”
“Well, fuck me,” I murmured.
“I would rather not.” He laughed. “Not because you’re not hot, but because I would like my head to stay on my shoulders.”
“I know.” I laughed. “But you know that I’ve already forgiven you, K? I understand that the circumstances weren’t the best, and what you did was most definitely not okay, but…” I trailed off. “I wasn’t a saint either. I think we can agree that both of us had our role to play in all of this, and if nothing else, I want us to be friends.”
“Friends.” He nodded, looking at his glass. “I mean, I was hoping I would somehow get the role of an uncle, but you know…” He shrugged, pouting at me.
“I think that one there,” I pointed at Indigo, “would fight you if you tried to be an uncle before him.”
“Both of us can be uncles,” he exclaimed. “Who says that we can’t?”
Ah, I missed this easygoing conversation.
“But on a more serious note,” he started, suddenly switching. “I found Maya, Birdy.”
My heart fucking stopped.
“Wh-What?” I stammered.
“I found Maya in Mexico, and I found the man who’s holding her.”
“Holy shit.” I huffed. “You’re sure it’s her?”
