Page 100 of Delirium
“After Nikolai shipped me off to Mexico, I was a wreck. I didn’t eat, couldn’t sleep, and I thought that the vomiting and the sickness was due to the fact that he dared to do that to me. He sold me to the worst kind of a man, and I let him, because I thought I had nothing left to live for. I didn’t fight him, Phee. I didn’t fight him,” she whimpered. “But then a miracle happened.” She smiled softly, pressing her hand to her stomach. “A teeny, tiny miracle I never knew I wanted, but it kept me sane, and it kept me far away from the monsters who wanted to ravage my body. After all, no one wanted to fuck a pregnant lady.”
“Oh, Maya,” I cried out. “Is it—”
“It was Kieran’s son,” she murmured. “His and mine. I hated it at first, you know? I hated it so much that I spent every waking hour thinking of ways to get rid of it. The baby reminded me of the lost look in Kieran’s eyes, of you, of everything we went through, but they wouldn’t let me. They didn’t want to let me abort, and it went on.” She took a deep breath as if she was collecting her thoughts. “He was so tiny when he was born, with long, black hair and the bluest eyes, Ophelia.” The first tear rolled down her cheek. “And I loved him. I fucking loved him so much. I didn’t think I could love another human being so much.”
“I’m so sorry,” I cried. I cried for her, for that baby, for the unfair life she had to go through—all of us in fact. “Did he—”
“He’s alive.” Fire blazed in her eyes. “But they took him from me. They fucking took him when I didn’t want to play by their rules.”
“Oh, Maya.”
“I could’ve escaped earlier, you know? I could’ve run away, but they still had him, and I couldn’t leave him there.”
“But now you have to,” I said, understanding washing over me. “That’s why you gave hell to Kieran.”
“That, and, well,” she smiled, “I didn’t want him to know about him. Not yet. I can see that he’s a changed man, Phee, I know that. But I’m not ready to share him, not yet. I’m not ready to look at Kieran and tell him that he has a son.”
“I understand, and I’m not going to say a word. I promise.”
“I know you won’t, but I’m telling you this so that you can understand—I won’t be able to stay too long. I won’t be able to stay here when he’s there, all alone.”
“I get it.” I did. I would do anything for my kids. “What do you need from me?”
“Nothing yet,” she murmured. “But when the time comes, I’m going to need help. I’m going to need to tell Kieran.”
Pain ricocheted from her to me, understanding what she must be feeling eating me alive, but I would help her. It was the least I could do.
“I’m here for you,” I said, getting up from my chair and getting closer to her. I crouched down, looking up at her. “Whatever you need, I’m here.”
“I know.” Her smile was wobbly, but it was there. “I know you are, and I’m sorry I won’t be able to be here all the time.”
“You will be once we get your son back.” I looked toward the door, lowering my voice. “What’s his name?”
“Damien.” She beamed. “And he’s so perfect, Ophelia. So, so perfect. They let me see him every now and then, but he doesn’t know me all too well. He has no idea I’m his mother, and it’s eating me alive that I couldn’t protect him from them.”
“But now you can.”
“Now I definitely can. I’m not the same girl I was back then, and I’m not afraid to kill for those I love. That I can promise.”
I knew she wasn’t the same, and the same fire blazing through my blood, lived inside hers as well. It didn’t matter who our fathers were. All that mattered was that we had a bond no one could deny.
I would help her in any way possible. That was my promise to her.
21
OPHELIA
Maya’s wordsrang in my head even two days after we spoke, but nothing could stop me from thinking about her little boy and the hand of destiny that was dealt to him. Was he okay? Was he hungry? Were they taking good care of him?
All these questions and no answers ate at my insides, and to make matters worse, I couldn’t tell Storm anything about it. I knew him, knew how he felt about people holding kids hostage, and I couldn’t ruin this for Maya.
So many choices were taken away from her. If she wanted to do this her way, then so be it. I would just need to calm myself down and make sure that I didn’t spill.
“You’re awfully quiet today,” Storm said as we entered Portland, heading toward the warehouse where Belladonna ran her operations. “Is everything okay?”
Nothing was really okay, but this was something I couldn’t share with him no matter how much I wanted to. I wanted him to hug me, to tell me that he would always go to our kids if anything ever happened to me, but I couldn’t worry him with that. He was already stressed out about me coming on this trip and putting additional stress on him would only end in disaster.
“It’s nothing.” I shrugged, keeping my voice even. “I’m just hoping we’ll be able to catch her today.”
