Page 81 of Wedded to the Devilish Highlander
She swallowed. “Nay, ye havenae.”
“It was six years ago,” Archer began. “Six years since I failed to save him. I thought it was only brigands, but… we were ambushed. We were ridin’ far from the castle—just the two of us. He’d asked me to go ridin’ with him that mornin’, and I was honored to do so. We took the two fastest horses and rode with the wind. It was the last time I felt real freedom.”
He shook his head, looking down at the floor. He paused for a long moment, seemingly lost in thought.
Eileen didn’t move from her spot, giving him the space he needed to continue. Something dark brewed beneath his thick eyebrows and in the snarl trembling on his lips.
“We were out on the moors when it happened. Six, seven, eight of them—I am nae sure how many. They rode over the ridge and straight for us. Faither and I kenned somethin’ was wrong, so we drew our swords immediately. He wasnae quick enough to stop the arrow that hit his shoulder.
“Then, it was carnage. Horses turning up the soft clods below, fogged breaths rising into the cold morning air, the clang of metal… Faither and I tried to fight them off. The grunts and moans came mostly from them at first, but then I heard Faither cry out. I couldnae see him as I was fightin’, but I kenned he was in trouble. There were just too many of them. I killed two, and me faither killed two, but it wasnae enough.
“Then, the rest of them turned tail and fled. When I looked around, Faither wasnae on his horse anymore. He lay on the ground, his hand pressed to his chest where they’d run him through with a sword. I ran to him, tried to pull him to his feet, but he only smiled and looked up at me.Be the best man ye can be and lead our clan. Those were his last words to me before he slipped into the next world.”
Eileen swallowed again. She knew what it was like to lose a father, but not like that. She wanted to go to him again, feel his skin against hers, comfort him, but he was a ball of hot rage, so she remained close but not too close.
“That’s awful,” she whispered.
“I thought it was an unfortunate ambush—brigands nae kennin’ who they killed and they took nothin’ for their troubles. I always wondered why they left me alive and nae him. I thought it was fate mockin’ me. But now I ken that it came from inside the castle. Maybe Mack, maybe someone else. They kenned where Faither and I would be, and they ordered the attack. They brought enough men and arms to overwhelm us, but we still took down four of them.
“For the longest time, I wished that I had been killed instead of Faither. He was a good man—thebestman—and a great laird. He led our people well, and I try to emulate him every day. I also ken now that they left me alone on purpose. They wanted me to become Laird so the questions me faither was askin’ stopped, and they did for a while. Until now.”
“And O’Gunn is behind it?” Eileen asked.
“Aye, he’s part of it,” Archer replied. “That, I have expected. What I didnae expect is for me own clan to turn against me, and even more unexpected is me clan turnin’ against Faither six years ago. This isnae somethin’ that has only recently been festerin’ in me castle—it’s been buildin’ up foryears. They came after me faither, and they’ll come after me.”
“It wasnae yer fault,” Eileen insisted. “I ken ye blame yerself for yer faither’s death, but ye couldnae have saved him. Even if ye had that day, they would have found another way to kill him.”
“I could have fought to the death,” Archer admitted. “I should have chased them down, or fought harder, or… done something.”
“There was nothin’ to be done, and ye ken it,” Eileen maintained, stepping closer to him. “If there was a traitor, they kenned where ye would be and how best to attack ye. If it was planned, then there was nay chance for ye to save him.”
Archer balled his fists. “If I had just done somethin’.”
“Ye couldnae have.” Eileen placed her hand on his shoulder. When he didn’t recoil from her touch, she slid her hand to his cheek. “It’s nae yer fault.”
Archer didn’t reply. He stood before her in the flickering candlelight, the rage in his eyes not dissipating, but he didn’t lash out because of it.
Eileen had never felt so close to him. Shortly after arriving at the castle, she had wished for him to open up to her and share what troubled him, all the shadows from his past, and he had.
She had the impression that he’d not shared his past with anyone, and it meant more to her than anything else. The way he’d made her feel in bed, pressed to his naked body, was sublime, but it didn’t compare to the intimacy she felt as she held her hand to his cheek and shared in his tragedy.
Archer stared down at her, his breathing slower now that he had shared his story.
“I spoke many times about what ye do to me, but I wasnae expectin’ that,” he said.
“What?” Eileen asked.
“This,” Archer emphasized. “Talkin’ about the past with ye—with anyone. I’ve never shared that with a soul before.”
“I’m glad ye did,” Eileen said quietly. “It’s been a burden on yer shoulders for too long, and even though ye’ll keep carryin’ it, I can carry it with ye. A man’s nae a man unless he faces his troubles, and ye’re nay coward, Archer. Ye’re facin’ yer troubles head-on, and I have to admit that ye have many of them.”
Archer chuckled. There was still a growl in his throat, but it was nice to hear him laugh.
He took half a step forward and pulled her in his arms, embracing her tightly. She wrapped her arms around him, running her hands over his muscular back. She tilted her head and pressed her ear to his chest to hear his heartbeat. Archer kissed the top of her head.
Eileen breathed him in. She’d never been in more danger, but she felt as safe as could be in his embrace.
Ye poor man. I cannae believe ye’ve been carryin’ that inside of ye for so long.
