Page 75 of My Crazy Killers
“I didn’t mean it like that,” he says, rolling his eyes as I turn slightly to look at him. “I meant, what happened to the confidence you had when you did a striptease for us? Not to mention the fact that just a few minutes ago you crawled naked between Eli’s legs to blow him.”
My cheeks heat, and I turn to face the other way, not sure why it’s different sometimes. Sly moves closer to Elias’s side and reaches across him to run a finger over my heated cheek. “Tell me what you’re feeling right now,” he asks.
“Embarrassed,” I whisper, avoiding eye contact as I stare at Elias’s flawless chest.
“Why?”
I shrug again and let a little annoyance at myself seep into my voice. “I don’t know! Why does it even matter?”
“Can you describe the feeling? Please?” I don’t know why it matters, but when I finally look at him, I can see he’s not judging me or trying to be mean. He has that assertive look on his face that he gets when he wants to control something. I’m not sure my embarrassment falls into that category, but I figure I can give him the benefit of the doubt.
“It’s in my stomach. It’s like…” I trail off, trying to think of a word to describe it. “Like butterflies.”
“Butterflies?” Pete asks from behind me as I watch Sly’s expression relax a little.
“I don’t think it’s embarrassment you’re feeling, Wren,” Sly says, his finger moving over my cheek again. “I think it’s nervousness.”
“It’s the same thing,” I argue back. “Isn’t it?”
“No. Embarrassment is when you feel self-conscious or ashamed. Nervousness, on the other hand, can be a good thing. Nerves and excitement come from the same place. It’s a sense of anticipation, and they often feel very similar. The difference lies in whether you’re worried about what’s coming or looking forward to it. And the best part?” he asks gently, “Is that you get to decide which one you’re feeling.”
“I do?”
He nods. “Yes. So whenever you get that feeling again, ask yourself, are you excited or nervous, and which one do youwantto be.”
That’s a really strange concept to try to wrap my head around. He’s saying what emotion I feel is up to me. Do I feel self-conscious right now? I thought I did, but nervousness might be a better way to explain it.
“I know my little vixen is in there,” Sly says, bringing my eyes back to him. “But so is my little bird. And she’s the one who still gets shy.”
“Your shyness mixed with nerves is probably what’s giving you those butterflies,” Elias adds, rubbing his hand soothingly up and down my back.
“Am I… reverting?” I ask with a bit of concern. I don’t want to go backward with all the progress I’ve made to become my own person. It’s been a long road, learning what I like and don’t like, and how I want to act. And being sexually confident is something I want for myself. Sometimes that’s easy. But sometimes, like now, it’s hard.
“No, sweetheart,” Elias says, hugging me against him. “You don’t always have to be full of confidence. I can assure you, we all enjoy both sides of you. I love the little sex kitten who straddled me naked and danced on my lap, but I also love this version of you who snuggles into me and bites her lips nervously. This version lets me be in control.”
“Remember, Wren,” Dex adds, “There’s no right or wrong way to act. Not with us. We love all sides of you, just as you do for us. Right?”
“Right,” I reply, smiling at him sitting behind Sly. I remember the blood lust he was lost in yesterday, and I loved him just as much like that as I did when he was my giant gentleman.
Jagger pushes to his feet, wearing only his tight boxers from where he’d been sitting behind Pete, and moves around near my feet. We all watch curiously as he starts signing.“You guys are on breakfast duty. It’s my turn with Wren.”
He reaches out a hand toward me, and I instantly take it. Elias releases me as Jagger pulls me to my feet, then lifts me up and throws me over his shoulder. “Hey!” I cry out in surprise, and he lightly slaps my ass, making me squeak out as I grip his waist.
I feel his hands moving, so I try to look around his waist as I ask, “What is he saying?”
Pete smirks as Jagger starts carrying me off. “He said he needs to teach you a lesson about being yourself.” When he sees my wide-eyed expression, he starts laughing and waves as I’m carried out of the room.
“Where are we going?” I ask, knowing he can’t answerme. He walks across the suite and enters a smaller bedroom I haven’t seen before. To be honest, I thought this suite just had the two large bedrooms. I feel a little silly for not realizing this room even existed. The bed is a little smaller, probably a queen-size, but it’s still beautifully decorated with lilac and white bedding and matching touches around the room.
He starts to slowly lower me down his body until I’m facing him. He encourages me to wrap my legs around his waist, which I do eagerly as I clutch on to his neck. He kisses me as he kneels on the bed, holding me.
I start to tilt backward as he lays me down and covers my body with his, all the while he kisses me. It’s slow and exploratory, as if he has all the time in the world. But it still has my body humming in approval as I grind my hips against his abs, searching for more.
After a few minutes, he slides a hand down my neck until he finds my breast. His movements there match his kiss. He’s slow and teasing, just massaging me as I silently beg for him to touch me where I really want him. I can feel my nipples harden, but he continues to avoid them, massaging everywhere butthere.
I dig my heels into his back and pull my mouth from his as I beg, “Please, Jagger! Touch me!”
The corner of his mouth tips up in amusement, and he squeezes my breast again as if to say,I am.
