Page 151 of Vicious Intentions
“Yes. Very much,” I reply, my shoulders slumping.
She reaches for my hand and gives it a gentle pat. “I’m sure Matteo will let you talk to them… when it’s safe enough to.”
I don’t ask what she means by that. Matteo hinted at something similar this morning. Once he’s sure I won’t leave him, then he’ll give me back my freedom. Until then, like Lucky would say, I’m shit out of luck.
“I just wish I could tell them that I’m okay. Especially my mother. She must be so worried,” I utter, not wanting to give up on my plan.
Paolina’s empathetic smile falls from her face at my words.
“She must be out of her mind with worry,” I add sullenly. “We’ve never spent a day apart. Her not knowing where I am or how I’ve been, must be killing her.”
“But she knows where you are,” Paolina stammers. “You’re here… with us… with your husband.”
“No.” I shake my head. “I’m with my captor. That’s what Matteo is. My kidnapper. Nothing more.”
Paolina pushes her chair back and rises to her feet.
“The boys should be home soon. I should… yes… I should start making dinner.”
“It’s not even three in the afternoon,” I protest. “Please,” I beg, scrambling to my feet. “Please help me. All I need is a phone. Just one call. Just one to tell my family I’m okay.”
I reach for her, but Paolina instinctively pulls back, fear flashing across her face.
“I can’t. I’m sorry… I just… I can’t,” she says hurriedly, turning her back to me as she rushes inside.
Before she can get far, I grab her by the arm, stopping her. “You must know how it feels to marry a man you hate,” I plead, stepping in front of her, blocking her escape. “I know you do.”
“Matteo is not Carlo. He’s not. He’s not. He’s not,” she repeats, shaking her head almost violently. “He wouldn’t hurt you. He wouldn’t. He wouldn’t. He wouldn’t.”
“You don’t know that. Once I’ve served whatever purpose he has for me, then he might.”
“Not Matteo. Not Matteo. He loves you. I can tell. I can tell. He wouldn’t hurt you. Not like Carlo. Never like Carlo. He wouldn’t. He wouldn’t. He wouldn’t.”
My eyes widen as she unravels right before my very eyes.
“Paolina, it’s okay. It’s okay,” I rush out, pulling her into an embrace, hoping my arms can erase whatever nightmarish memory I’ve just stirred.
I must have pushed too hard, and now this poor, sweet woman is coming apart in my arms because of it.
If I thought my mother-in-law could help me, I see now that I was wrong. She can barely fight off the demons in her own mind, much less help me face mine.
No. Paolina won’t be of any use to me, and I’m ashamed to have even tried. I’ll just have to find another way out of this. Right now, my biggest concern is talking her down and restoring her trademark bright smile.
“Shh, Paolina. It’s okay. You’re safe here. You’re safe,” I whisper, rubbing slow, soothing circles against her back. Her body continues to shake against mine, and it takes a few minutes for her to calm down. “How about I take you up to your room so you can lie down for a bit?” I smile softly at her. “A nap mightdo you a world of good. And when you wake up, you’ll feel like yourself again.”
I hope.
Paolina’s only response is a small nod. I keep hold of her as we make our way to her room, on the second floor. When we get there, I help her onto the bed and pull a light blanket over her.
“I’m sorry I overwhelmed you. It won’t happen again,” I whisper after she’s settled in, running my fingers through her hair. “You’ve shown me nothing but kindness. It was never my intention to cause you pain. I’m so sorry, Paolina.”
I lean in and press a kiss to the top of her head, then try to slip out of the room, not wanting to disturb her any further.
“My Matteo loves you, Anna. I know he does. I know it,” she whispers, drawing me to glance back at her.
I don’t see what good it would do to contradict her delusions, so I offer her a faint smile instead.
“Rest well. If you need me, I’ll be in my room,” I say, then close the door gently behind me.
