Page 66 of Stranger's Choice
Chapter 19
After several nightsout with Marsone, interspersed with more among the court, Sebin wanted a break. He deserved a break. The leaders of the rebellion still needed to work out many details, but from his perspective, things were mostly in place. Heolin and Tjalik had to organize their people and find common ground without his help. He was still in charge of organizing the courtiers and looking for the Emperor’s weaknesses, but he had those pieces nearly ready.
He and Pianti had reached out to those sympathetic to a revolution based on improving life for everyone rather than transferring power from one man to another. And between Auraelie’s lies about her visions, and her and Qilar’s work finding accomplices among the Will, the Emperor would be plenty weak when Tjalik and Heolin were ready.
So Sebin decided not to spend another evening maintaining his mask in front of the court. Instead, he retired early. He could brood until Auraelie returned from a supper among her new allies.
Lounging on the cushions in his room, Sebin twisted his ring around on his finger. Once Auraelie was freed from the Emperor, he’d give her the rest of his charms. Even when she went back to her own people, and didn’t need a null charm to protect herself from casual or accidental contact, she still might find a use for them.
What Sebin didn’t know was what he would do after he handed over the charms. Auraelie would be free. The Assembly would be busy establishing new laws. Sebin couldn’t interfere there, not if he wanted the Assembly to succeed. Perhaps he could stay and actually negotiate a few trade agreements. But then he’d have no reason to remain in Pynth.
Not with Auraelie back among the oracles.
Five hells, even if she wanted him to join her among her people, their time together would be limited. She couldn’t touch him without the null charm, and he didn’t have enough to last forever. If he wanted more, he’d have to return to Moial. He couldn’t trust such a commission to a letter, or delivery to anyone unknown.
He didn’t even know if Auraelie would want him with her once she left Kalitalo. They avoided talking about the future for fear of someone overhearing something treasonous. At least, that’s the reason Sebin clung to.
As if summoned by his thoughts, Auraelie entered his room. It was earlier than she usually returned in the evening. Earlier than Sebin usually returned to his rooms, too.
“Oh,” Auraelie said, “you’re back already.”
“Apparently, we both wanted to retire early this evening.”
“Right.” She unhooked her veil, so it dangled on one side of her face, then twisted her fingers together in a nervous gesture he had never seen from her before. “Since you’re here, I should tell you something.”
Sebin stood up and went over to where she still stood, only a step away from the door. He pulled her into his arms, but she was stiff. He stepped back, but kept his hands on her arms. “Auraelie, what’s wrong?”
He expected to hear that someone had spoken too freely among the Will. That Lhashiki was even now telling the Emperor to look for rebels in his court. He wouldn’t blame her, she had to know that. But he needed to know so that they could adapt the plan.
Auraelie looked down at the floor. “I’m not sure. I mean, I wasn’t sure if I was going to tell you. That’s why I left supper early, so I could think, but you are already here, so maybe that is a sign I should tell you. You deserve to know, it’s not that I don’t want to tell you, but it is so early, and I could be wrong . . .”
“Auraelie.” Sebin placed one hand on her chin and turned her head toward him. She refused to look him in the eyes. “Just tell me.”
She breathed in deeply. Out. In. Out. Finally, she looked at him for a split second before staring back at his chest. Her hands came up and clenched his vest. “It is probably nothing. I’ve been drinking the tea every day. But I’m late, and I’m never late.”
Sebin matched his own breathing to hers. In. Out. In. Out. He needed to reassure her, but he didn’t know what she wanted to hear. All he managed was, “You’re with child.”
“Maybe?” Auraelie looked at him again. “It really is very early. I might be wrong. But what if I’m not?”
Not excited, then. Sebin felt a glimmer of disappointment at the thought. Beneath his shock, he thought he might be a little excited about Auraelie having his child.
“Sebin.” Auraelie’s voice quivered. “I don’t want my baby taken away from me.”
“Of course not.” Sebin again wondered exactly what she was feeling, but at least he could answer this concern. “I won’t let the Emperor take your baby.”
“You might prevent the Emperor from raising your child as one of his Will, but only by claiming the baby yourself. I know you will be a good father, Sebin, but it still means the baby will be taken from me. I know it would be a better life, but I don’t want to be separated from him or her.” She pressed her hand to her stomach. “I’m not even sure if I’m pregnant and I already can’t stand the idea of being separated.”
Sebin wrapped his arms back around her. “You won’t be. Auraelie, I won’t take your baby, nor will I let the Emperor take him or her. You and your child will both be free.”
It hurt to say the words. He didn’t want to be separated from this baby, either, but he wouldn’t force himself on Auraelie in any way. Later, once she was free, he’d talk to her about what role he would have in her life when she no longer had to cater to the Emperor’s every whim. If she’d welcome him, he’d stay in Pynth.
For his child, he’d stay in Pynth. Even if there wasn’t a child. if Auraelie wanted him, he’d stay. He’d find a way to import null charms without alerting anyone. He’d live among the oracles with her.
If she didn’t want him to stay . . . well, he wasn’t sure how far he would go, but he’d certainly try to convince her.
“I promise I’ll see you free,” Sebin repeated. “You’ll hold your child in your arms and know that no one will ever steal her from you.”
Her. Sebin could imagine a daughter with Auraelie’s raven hair and bright green eyes. Or maybe a son, running around safe in the knowledge that his mother would always be there to hold him when he fell.
