Page 68 of Plus-Size Sold Mate
I didn’t tell Luke before I left the house because I didn’t want to have to explain myself again.
Right now, I don’t want to talk or receive reassurance. I don’t want to hear the same words when I don’t see any change around me.
I just want to breathe, and I want to be alone, even if it’s ironic.
After being the girl who couldn’t shift, then the odd one who needed to be dissected, I hoped being forced into this pack would be different. I hoped the bond with Luke would anchor me and, at the very least, give me the chance to be someone new. But even now, I’m standing on the outside, wondering if any of this can ever work.
Luke might’ve chosen me, but that doesn’t guarantee the others will do the same. Instead, I’m the Luna to a pack that doesn’t fully see me as that, and I’m carrying his baby.
It’s bad enough to endure this myself, but the thought of my child receiving the same treatment makes everything in me ache.
If they see me as the one who tainted Coldreach with magic, then what’s stopping them from blaming the byproduct of our bond?
Just as I stop to look out at the ocean beyond the coastline, the deep breath I pull in is interrupted by the softcrack of a stick nearby, and I stiffen. My magic instinctively rises just before I catch his scent in the breeze.
Luke. Of course.
“You weren’t at the house,” he says, stepping within sight now, scanning me quickly like he’s checking for fatal wounds on my harmless walk.
“I needed air,” I murmur, arms crossing.
“You didn’t tell me.”
“I didn’t think I needed permission to walk on your property,” I return, vaguely bitter.
I don’t mean to be this way, but with everything going on, my edges don’t feel very soft, and I don’t have the capacity to change that.
“You shouldn’t disappear right now,” he says with a quiet breath. “You’re not justyouanymore.”
While true and meant to be harmless, that statement feels more like a cage closing in around me, reducing me to nothing more than something for him to coddle while desperately trying to make the others accept me.
“I’m still me, and I just wanted to be alone.”
“I know you are,” Luke murmurs, but he can’t hide the tension moving through him. “You want to be alone a lot lately. I don’t want you to think that’s your reality.”
My brows furrow at that. “But it is. It has been for years.”
“And it doesn’t need to be. I told you, I’m with you on this. Nothing else matters.”
“Nothing?” I question, tone becoming more incredulous now. “The pack matters, Luke. You’re the Alpha. I know you care about what they think because you’re supposed to, and I knowit’s killing you to pretend like you don’t. But pretending isn’t getting us anywhere.”
“I’m not pretending. I’m trying to enforce respect,” he returns, a little guarded now.
“And I don’t want it to be forced! I want it to be real. I don’t want to be the reason they resent you, too.”
“Then what am I supposed to do?” he asks, taking a step closer as more frustration rolls off his shoulders. “Let them question you and our child? Stand by while they undermine my mate?”
Mate. That word should steady me as it did before, but now it just feels like more pressure.
“I want you to see that this is my nightmare playing out all over again,” I tell him, voice shaking now despite how I try to steady it. “I grew up like this. I was always different and watched like I was something unusual. I was ignored or mocked, and I promised myself it would never happen again. I told myself that if I ever found someone who chose me completely, I wouldn’t have to feel that anymore. But I still do, and worse, I have to be their Luna at the same time. I’m a freak put on display for them, and I have no choice but to stomach it.”
Luke’s expression goes rigid, like he finally sees the bigger picture. His eyes search mine, and he tries to shake it off. “You’re not a freak, Sera.”
“Then why am I still a target?”
Something vaguely hopeless crosses his features for a moment, and he reaches out for my arms. “I never meant for you to be one.”
“But I am,” I press. “Because of you, it’s even worse now.”
