Page 55 of Lost Lake
“I’d be glad to try. Not until we find Lucy, and Kenna’s killer. But afterward…” He gave her a trembling smile.
She squeezed his hand, then directions from the female GPS voice came over the speaker.
El let go of their personal discussion and pressed on the gas to enter the little town where Kenna’s parents lived.
She drove past small houses and an almost nonexistent downtown with a grocery store, drugstore, and bank. Her heart had grown lighter than the situation called for. Gabe had done that in his willingness to pursue a relationship with her—someone who had done the most horrific thing in failing a young child in the past—and yet he wanted to be with her.
This is You, isn’t it, God? I know it’s not me. Not in my humanness could I ever let go of my guilt for even a moment to entertain someone being able to love me. Maybe You’re telling me to put that guilt behind me once and for all. That I’m forgiven and have a clean slate going forward. Maybe that I don’t even need forgiveness because it was an honest mistake. But I do need forgiveness for the many years I’ve let guilt lead me and avoided choices You had for me. Please let that stop today and let my heart be open to Your leading.
12
Shocked, Gabe paused on the sidewalk outside the unkempt and rundown single-story home in the neighborhood full of high-end homes. Something had changed in the James family.
This place didn’t at all resemble the well-manicured and maintained property where Kenna had grown up.
Gabe aimed to find out what was going on. He rang the bell as El joined him, after saying goodbye to the deputy who’d met them to pick up the evidence from Kenna’s house.
Mrs. James pulled the door open. Or at least he thought it was her. She had once been as beautiful as Kenna, but her skin sagged as wrinkles crawled like a road over her face. She wore a gray jogging suit, the sweatshirt stained on the front with what resembled splotches of coffee. Odd. Women in the neighborhood used to envy her fashionable wardrobe.
She eyed them both, no recognition of Gabe’s identity dawning on her face.
“If you’re here to sell or preach at me, don’t bother. I’m not interested.” She started to push the door closed.
El held out her credentials. “Are you Mary James, Kenna James’s mother?”
Mrs. James scowled. “Yeah, but not like I’ve seen or heard from the ungrateful girl in years.”
El cringed. “Could we come in for a minute, please?”
She planted a hand on her hip. “This about Kenna? She must’ve done something really bad to get you here.”
“Please, can we come in and talk about it?”
Mrs. James shifted on her feet. Ran her gaze from one to the other. “Fine. But I’m busy, so only a few minutes. And before you say anything about that girl, I won’t bail her out. Just so you know.”
She made room for them to enter and backed away. El pushed past her like Speedy Gonzalez, as if she was afraid Mrs. James would change her mind. Gabe followed, wondering if the woman would act any differently when she learned Kenna had died.
Gabe recognized the traditional beige sofa he’d watched movies from with Kenna, but it was now worn from years of use. As he sat next to El, he looked around the room. The same furniture he remembered from his childhood filled the space painted a calming blue. Dust covered most of the wooden furniture and water rings underneath were too numerous to count.
Mrs. James plopped onto a faded blue easy chair with a matching ottoman. She propped her bare feet up. “Now what is it you want to tell me?”
El slid to the edge of the sofa and laid her hands on her lap. “I’m sorry to tell you this, Mrs. James, but Kenna was found dead on Friday night.”
Mrs. James shifted her feet to the floor and sat upright. “Dead. But how?”
“We’re investigating it as a homicide.”
“Homicide, huh? I knew that girl would come to no good.”
Gabe sucked in a sharp breath. What a horrible way for a mother to talk about her daughter. “Stop right there. Kenna led an exemplary life and was a terrific mother and role model. You’ve spoken badly about her far too often over the years, and you can’t possibly be blaming her for her own death.”
Mrs. James sniffed. “You seem to know a lot about her, but who in the world are you?”
Gabe squared his shoulders. “Gabe Irving. Kenna’s friend since first grade.”
“You?” She blinked several times. “You’re that scrawny kid who hung around her all those years? Don’t tell me you finally got her to fall for you and you got married. That you’re the father of the kid I heard she’d had.”
Just like this woman to misread everything. “I’ve never had a romantic relationship with Kenna and never wanted to. But I was honored to be her best friend and be there for her in lieu of you and her family. Especially to help with Lucy, even though she’s not my daughter.”
