Page 46 of Shadow of Fear
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Kinsley stared at the copious memories spread across the double bed she was sharing with Jada. Her face hurt from smiling and laughing over all the fun stories they’d shared for the past few hours since she’d returned from her apartment, and she could tell her friend was having a good time, too. The time was supposed to help her forget about the shooter, but underneath the fun, she still couldn’t let go of the fear that some man was trying to end her life. Of the sight of her apartment. The mess. The turmoil. The stress. The call to Sierra on the way back here somehow making it all real.
All things fighting to evaporate the joy she’d planned to experience with her best friend this week.
Maybe it would be different if they had a solid suspect. Something—anything—to go on. Evidence other than the photograph and a tiny piece of chain. Maybe Sierra would find something when she arrived at the apartment in the morning. Or Nick could enlarge the photo without distorting it to reveal a lead. They’d both been known to pull a rabbit out of a hat, and that’s what Kinsley needed right now. One giant bunny.
Somehow, she wasn’t convinced that Huff was behind the shooting and break-in, but that could be because she hadn’t had any contact with him for years, and his truly ugly behavior directed toward her at the trial had faded some. She loved her job, reviewing plans, site pictures, questioning workers and supervisors, and coming to conclusions on how the items under investigation should be handled.
She didn’t like finding wrongdoing. That was the job, but only because she was charged with defending the innocent. Defending people who would interact with defective products where shortcuts had been taken to save money, often resulting in injury, and she felt a real responsibility to these people.
Something she couldn’t simply let go of just because she wanted to have a fun week of remembering her childhood. Her childhood had passed. She would never get back the full excitement and joy spending time with this family—this wonderful family—had brought. Wishing they were her true family. Wishing she could live with them full-time. They’d embraced her. Made her as much a family member as possible. And she needed to just accept her role and not constantly worry they would tell her to get lost if she did the wrong thing.
She knew they weren’t those kind of people, but that niggling worry had lived inside her throughout her childhood. That two families would reject her and she would be alone. Totally alone.
Jada yawned. “We should probably put all of this stuff away and get some sleep.”
Kinsley slipped to the edge of the bed and started to pick up movie ticket stubs, friendship bracelets, letters and postcards, songbooks from camp, journals, pictures, and all the other memories a child and teenager might save into the box.
“I can’t believe you kept this much stuff.” Jada came alongside her and helped. “Maybe tomorrow we can go to my mom’s storage locker and raid the items that I never got rid of.”
“Did you ever intentionally keep anything? Or was it just a matter of your mom saving what you left behind when you moved out?”
“No, there’s a bunch of stuff I kept in a shoebox for sure. But it was just a shoebox, not a moving-size box like this one.” Jada tapped it and laughed. “But then you were always much more touchy-feely than me.”
“Yeah, I still am. Which is really funny for my career. It’s more of a matter-of-fact, black-and-white kind of thing.” Kinsley sat back. “I guess the touchy-feely comes from me wanting to make sure no one is hurt by substandard products.”
“I guess we’re both crusaders in our own way. Remember back when we were kids and we were so into rescuing every little animal, insect, or amphibian that was in danger?” Jada smiled. “Mom was so patient with us when we brought all the creepy crawly things home.”
“One of the many things I love about her is her acceptance and respect for other people and their differences.” Kinsley sighed. “I’d like to think I’ve become the person I am today because of her.”
“Dad did that, too.” Jada’s expression sobered. “I wish you could’ve met him. Sad that we lost him too young. He could’ve had a similar influence on us for many more years.”
Tears pricked Kinsley’s eyes, and she clutched Jada’s hands. “I’m still sorry you lost him so young, but I’m glad we became friends and you were able to talk about him with me and come to grips with your loss.”
“I’ll forever be grateful for that. I don’t know what I would’ve done if we hadn’t met.”
The kiss came to mind. What had Kinsley done? Behave like a traitor, that’s what. She’d met Jada when she was still vulnerable from the loss of their father, and somehow Kinsley connected with her and helped her to talk about her dad in a way that she wasn’t able to do with anyone else. They forged a strong bond that no one could break.
No one except Kinsley and Dev if they got together.
Kinsley released Jada’s hands and touched her lips—remembered the connection she had with this man. Something she’d never experienced before. Oh gosh, she would love another kiss. Just one. Many. So what? It didn’t matter what she wanted. She wouldn’t let it happen, and she had to tell Dev that in no uncertain terms. The only way she could consider kissing him again was if Jada blessed their union.
Jada shook her head. “Now listen to us. We’ve gone from having fun to being weepy.” She started picking up items from the bed again and depositing them in the box. “Do you want to put the lamp away or should we leave it for a nightlight?”
“I vote nightlight,” Kinsley said without question. “That way if I wake up in the night, I’ll have a good memory instead of remembering the bad things that are going on.”
Jada plugged the lamp in on the nightstand near the right side of the bed. Her friend had a good memory. Whenever the two of them had shared a bed, Kinsley always had to sleep on the right side. She didn’t know why, but if she tried the left, she couldn’t sleep.
Jada put the last of the items into the box. “I don’t know about you, but I’m going to crash right now.”
Kinsley still felt antsy and didn’t want to keep Jada awake. “I’ll grab a glass of water first.” She got up. “Do you want anything?”
“Thanks, but I’d probably be asleep by the time you brought it to me.” Jada set the box on the floor, then crawled under the worn handmade patchwork quilt. She rubbed her eyes and plumped up the pillow.
Kinsley went to her friend and tucked the covers up around her neck, then gave her a kiss on the forehead. “Sleep tight, friend. Thank you for always being there for me.”
“You do the same thing for me.” She closed her eyes. “Don’t stay up too late. We have a big day tomorrow.”
