Page 74 of Eternally Bound
Love,she thought as she watched him pacing a hole into the rug. She cared for him, deeply, but love?Just get through one thing at a time,she told herself.You can figure that out later.
“What do you mean by at least one of them continues to feed on humans?” she asked.
He stopped pacing and turned to face her. “At least one vampire needs to still have fresh blood from an outside food source, but the other can survive solely off the blood of their mate, if that is what they chose to do.”
“I see. And you truly believe me to be your mate?”
“From the moment I saw you, I wanted you, and believe me, that is not something I’ve experienced in years, and I’veneverexperienced it as strongly as I do with you.”
“What?” she blurted. “I’m sure you’ve seen and desired thousands of women over the centuries.”
He had the nerve to chuckle.
“I have,” he confirmed. “And when I was younger, I found a diversion in those women. As I got older and the years wore on me more, my need for death and blood started to outweigh my desire for women. Eventually, all I cared about was killing and sating the demon within me.”
“I’m not really sure what you’re telling me. All you want to do is kill?”
“The demon DNA that lurks within all vampires is stronger in purebreds. We are more closely tied to the demon than a turned vampire is, and we have more of the demon’s traits. When a male purebred becomes fully mature, the demon becomes this insatiable, clawing thing that is only caged through strength of will, or the finding of a mate. Some set it free and let it do as it will and become Savage; others fight it every day of their lives. The females can experience it too, but not on the same level or with the same intensity as the males. I am assuming this was the way of the demons too.
“In each male purebred, the insatiable demon shows itself in different ways. Some seek out pain, others copious amounts of blood, others want death, some can’t have enough sex, some lock themselves away from humans, and others give in and become Savage to make it stop. Turned vampires can experience it too, but not as strongly as purebreds do.
“In all purebred males, maturity means they stop aging, their power increases and continues to do so as they age, and they hunger for things to the point of madness,” he continued. “Many experience a combination of heightened urges, but there is usually one that is more dominant than the others.
“For me, that dominant thing is death and blood. I am a bloodthirsty killer, and I enjoy it. I’ve focused my impulses on hunting Savages, and it has kept the madness at bay for a millennia, but every year it has become increasingly difficult to keep myself in check. Every year, I feel the madness seeping in more and more. And with every year, I stopped wanting women and craved the blood more, untilyou. I want you a thousand times more than I want to kill, which is something Ineverbelieved I’d be able to say.”
Kadence bit on her lip as she tried to understand the battle he’d been waging against himself. She couldn’t imagine what it must be like to live only for death, or how hopeless some days must feel for him. Yet, she brought him some hope.
“You could never be like one of those Savages,” she murmured.
“I could and I will, without you. I’ve been more out of control since we had sex, and that is because the bond isn’t complete, Kadence. The rest of it must be finished, and you will become a vampire when it is done.”
Her hand instinctively flew to her neck when his eyes latched onto it. “No,” she said as memories of the suffering Joseph had inflicted on her burst through her mind.
CHAPTER 33
Ronan didn’t like what he would have to do to her, didn’t want to bring her any pain, but that is all he would bring to her when she went through the change. There would be no stopping that. He would give anything not to have her become a part of his world, but he couldn’t change what had been set into motion, not now that she’d returned here.
“I am sorry, Kadence,” he said. “I would change this if I could.”
The fear in her eyes was nearly his undoing. “It will hurt.”
Never in his life had he felt this helpless and inadequate. “The taking of blood isn’t painful, if you’re willing. It will be nothing like what you experienced with Joseph if you don’t fight me. It’s extremely pleasurable to those who are willing.”
“Have you ever allowed another to do it to you?” she demanded, not at all liking the idea that another had known him in such a way.
“I’ve never allowed another to feed from me, but I do know that those I’ve fed from have never been harmed by it. Some enjoyed it nearly as much as sex, some more so. You will be the first and only vampire who will ever take my blood.”
She recoiled from him. “Me? Drink blood?”
“That is what vampires do.”
“I know that’s what you’ve meant this entire time, but I never reallythoughtabout what being a vampire completely entailed.”
She had no idea how to react to anything he was telling her. A vampire, her? Tied to him for an eternity? What if he annoyed her or treated her badly?
He was abrasive, demanding, and used to getting his way. She was certain he would annoy her numerous times over an eternity, but he would never treat her badly. That she knew with absolute certainty. But to drink blood? The idea made her stomach turn. However, when she looked at him again, she had to admit that it didn’t seem as repulsive if it washisblood. She found herself curious to know what it would actually taste like.
She found herself licking her lips before she shook her head to clear it of the absurd notion. “This is all so much,” she muttered.
