Page 3 of Seal the Deal
“I’m fine,” Andrew automatically answers, not sure whether it’s true or not but positive that it doesn’t matter regardless. Not today. This is Alec’s day. Alec’s tux fitting for hiswedding. He’s not going to let any of them know how much it’s dredging up painful feelings of loneliness or jealousy. He’d rather die.
“I’m going to go ask Denise something really quick,” Andrew says.
“Ask her what?” Charlie questions.
“None of your business,” Andrew replies, both because Charlie is a nosy bastard and because he has no idea what he’s going to ask. It’s merely an excuse to get out of this room for a few minutes before the urge to claw his own skin off becomes obvious to his brothers.
He intends to hide in the little sitting area for a few minutes, but the plan is thwarted when he steps out of Alec’s dressing room and finds Jason, Emerson and Theo all sprawled on the couches. Or more accurately, Jason is plopped on the middle,Theo is leaned against him on one side and Emerson is curled into his other side.
“Aren’t you three cozy.”
Jason flips him off with a smile while Emerson blushes, and Theo sits up a little straighter.
“We’re waiting for Denise,” Theo blurts, as if he’s somehow in trouble. Andrew has always liked Theo, even after everything that happened. He’s quiet, reliable, and his baseline anxiety leads him to over explain himself. While Andrew doesn’t want him to be anxious, his own need to know what’s going on at all times is always soothed by Theo’s explanations.
“I think she was going to do Alec first. He’s in there with Charlie.”
“Why aren’t you in there?” Jason asks, stroking Emerson’s hair with one hand while squeezing Theo’s neck with the other. They really are the most tactile, codependent best friends Andrew has ever seen, but considering how intertwined he and Charlie are, he’s certainly not one to judge. Besides it works for them, and Alec seems happy to be wherever Theo is, any lingering jealousy he held over Theo’s closeness to his brother long gone. He wonders if they all just make some kind of massive cuddle pile when they go on double dates. Knowing them, probably.
“Andrew,” Jason prompts.
“Sorry,” Andrew mumbles, unsure what’s gotten into him today. He’s usually better at masking his own messy emotions.
“Do you need a hug?” Jason asks. It’s so like Jason, who seems to think a snack and a hug fix all problems.
“No,” Andrew answers, despite the fact that he could probably use one. Most of the time the only person he lets hug him the way he needs is Charlie. Sometimes Eden, who feels more like his own little brother than his brother’s boyfriend or even a friend.
It should be easy with Jason. He’s Andrew’s actual brother, but somehow it’s not. It never has been. It’s not easy for Andrew to let most people get close to him. While he would love to pretend he doesn’t know why, that’s not the truth. He knows exactly why. He just doesn’t want to deal with it right now. Or ever.
“I’ve got to go ask Denise something,” Andrew lies, pretty sure he’s going to need to make something up at this point. Charlie might be a nosy fucker, but he and Alec forget everything when they’re distracted. Jason isn’t as nosy, but he’s observant and will notice if Andrew goes anywhere except for Denise’s office right now.
Ignoring the fact that he’s pretty sure they’re all watching him, he crosses the room and takes a turn down the small hallway that leads to Denise’s office. The door is cracked so Andrew pushes the door open and steps inside, regretting it immediately when he hears his name.
“I know, but I need to talk to Andrew.”
Andrew stills, fully prepared to back out of the office when Denise continues speaking to someone on the phone.
“He’s not going to like this,” Denise sighs. “In fact, he’s going to hate this. I don’t even know if I feel right asking him, babe.”
The only person Denise calls babe is her girlfriend Amanda, which answers the question of who she’s talking to but not why, especially where Andrew is concerned. He’s very rarely the center of anyone’s conversation, and that’s by design. He doesn’t like to be talked about or noticed.
“I know, but what if—” Denise sighs again before she’s clearly cut off. While Amanda speaks, Denise nods her head even though Amanda can’t see her. Andrew suddenly feels like he shouldn’t be here witnessing this, even if they are discussing him. Slowly, he tries to back out of the office, but he trips onthe rug, crashing into the doorjamb with a muttered curse that draws Denise’s attention.
“I’ll call you back,” Denise says, hanging up her call before laying her phone on the edge of her work table.
“The door was open,” Andrew explains, just in case she doesn’t know. “I should’ve knocked.”
“I always tell you not to knock, doll.”
“Still.” Andrew rubs his elbow, wishing he’d managed to escape unnoticed. Unlike Charlie, he’s not nosy. He wants to know things, but not like this. His curiosity has hard limits, including being caught accidentally eavesdropping. This feels uncomfortably close to confrontation. Close enough Andrew’s ears buzz. “I’ll go.”
“Andrew.”
“I, um,” but Andrew can’t even think of something to say.
“Come for dinner tonight,” Denise tells him. “I’ll explain everything.”
“Can’t you just explain now,” Andrew says, emboldened solely by the prospect of having to spend the next few hours running worst case scenarios through his brain.
