Page 96 of Because I Killed Him
Edmund, meanwhile, remains rigid from the eyebrows down, breathing so shallowly that I’m surprised he hasn’t turned as blue as his blood. Whatever line I’ve crossed, it’s one I didn’t know existed. I can’t tell whether it’s anger, embarrassment, or something worse he’s trying to swallow.
“Good day, Mother,” Edmund says, offering her his arm.
Phillipa catches the cue. “Good day, Miss Waldsten.”
She offers me a final smile, then slips her arm through Edmund’s, and they walk to the door. Edmund shoulders past the Pinkie and helps his mother into her coat, his fingers gentle at her collar, his voice low as he murmurs something I can’t hear. The tenderness feels jarringly out of place. Or maybe it’s just that I’ve never seen him like this before.
When Phillipa leaves, she takes the light with her.
Now it’s just Edmund and me.
And I wish it weren’t.
He turns, his head lowered, fury radiating off him like a solar flare. It hits me so hard I half expect to be shoved backward over the terrace railing.
His voice drops into his chest, bordering on a growl. “Explain.”
“I’m sorry. I should’ve waited outside.” I resist the urge to step back. “I didn’t know your mother would be here. I came early because I need to talk to you.”
Edmund’s chin dips, and the veins in his neck swell. “Talk to me when it’s ourscheduledtime.”
His response gives me the nerve to step closer. “Maybe Iwouldif you’d ever let me get a word in. You pause so rarely that I’m shocked you haven’t choked to death on your own voice.”
He lifts a finger. “You won’t do this again, Miss Waldsten. You won’t come here outside our schedule. And youwon’tcome alone.”
His anger is still there, but there’s desperation too, almost dread. I can’t make sense of it. Why is he so upset? What’s wrong with me meeting his mother?
I nod and say, “All right.”
“Pardon my intrusion, Mr. Prew,” his Pinkie calls from the door. “Breakfast is served.”
Edmund steps past me, stripping off his dress gloves as he strides to the table on the terrace.
I glance after him, caught between staying and going. He didn’t tell me to leave or order the Pinkie to throw me out into the hall. We still need to talk. If it came down to it, Dad would give me all the civil credits I need, but asking him would mean explaining how I lost so many in the first place. That means I have to solve this with Edmund. I need to find a solution before I lose enough civil credits to land on the expulsion list.
So, I follow.
The table is set with a full, steaming meal. Edmund arches an eyebrow as I sit across from him, but says nothing. He chooses a flank of steak with a steady hand, his anger cooling slowly. His eyes are distant now, as if whatever’s running through his mind is miles away and has nothing to do with me.
Behind him, the sun rises slowly, spilling golden light over his features. It highlights the sharp, proud angles of his face in a way that makes him seem elevated, as if even the sun itself knows Blue is best.
“Next Saturday, the schedule is changing,” Edmund says, intercepting the coffee pot just as my hand moves for it. He pours himself a cup, then sets the coffee pot out of my reach. “You and Miss Deering are getting let off early.”
I keep my expression neutral, hiding the fact that I’m pleased. Edmund has never given us a full day off before. At first, I wonder if he needs privacy to meet his mistresses, but then I recall a passing comment from Dickie:Edmund will be twenty-two soon. It’s a late age to enter Grandmaster University. Most students start at eighteen or nineteen. What’s he been doing all this time?
“Saturday is your birthday,” I say.
“And Rosamund’s.” He picks up his knife and slices through his steak. “My mother is organizing a party for us, so you’re free at noon.”
“I might not be free at all if I end up on the expulsion list.”
Edmund’s hand stops, the knife scraping against the plate with a grating screech. He exhales sharply. “What’s the problem now?”
“My civil credit score.”
“Show me.”
I connect to his Bond. Edmund continues cutting his steak, barely glancing at the screen before his mouth twists in disgust.
